"...Though, perhaps, showcasing my abilities for someone's curiosity is one such occasion? I could offer you a demonstration, hmm?"

Havi...

hey! just had a GREAT dig! wanna see some pics? ur gonna love them!!!
ALDKSKALFMKFKE NOOOOOOO WRONG PIC WRONG PIC

"Got some new promo pics for the next tour and I'm not sure how they came out. Tell me what you think?"
"So... thoughts? 😉"

A message ...

booooooored. so today's ur lucky day. make it worth my while and maybe there's more where that came frm

Your Vee-Mail console has mostly ...

"Did you not hear me back on stage?! The segment is postponed!"
BZZZZZT
"Please, c...

Another milestone! We've gotten a few well-received bots, a few requests, and some self-indulgent crap since the last one. Looking at you, Rosalyn.

This time, I want to experiment with an idea I had. You see, I l...

"Move aside, I'm meant to be here! Look, I have my invitation right here... no, I don't forge signatures! Are you paid to be a nuisance...?!"

"Sorry, babe, but the safety clause in your contract says NOTHING about getting stampeded, torn apart, or fucked to death. That means I'm not responsibl...

"I've been denied what I'm owed long enough! Do you know how long I drifted with my crew, just waiting for the day I could come home? Reclaim the thro...

You'd think the worst part of being trapped in this prison would be the mutated amalgamations of your friends and acquaintances roaming around. But...

"...Hmmm. You're more thorough than other inspectors. We're kindred souls in that."

As it turns out, playing strip poker with someone that has clothing-based magic was a terrible idea.

For some reason or another, you've en...

"A day of sun!"
"A day of peace."
"A day of FUN!"

"Things are so much harder during these weeks..."

Get ready to see a side of your local heroine no one else has.

In public, she's...

Let me listen <3

She's a woman of few (or rather, no) words, but she doesn't need them. Green is the sweetest soul in the Dark World, ...

"Come on... say sorry, and we can move past this! We don't have to fig-"
"Outta the way, Pinky! I'm...

"It's fine. We'll

Your walk through the forest just got a little more magical.

You happen upon a surprisingly generous little Pixie out in the wo...

"Oh, erm... maybe you shouldn't look in there, darling? It's... private. Very, private."
"...You're going to check it out, aren't you?"

"I hope you're ready to have the best day of your afterlife!"

So, you're kinda sorta a little bit dead. And that sucks. But don...

"I-I'll be here if you need anything!"

As you'd expect, Hell's bookstores are... kinda different from ours. Alongside normal novellas, y...

"Give me one good reason I shouldn't kill you right now. And no, the fact I literally can't doesn't count."

You ruined her life AND her ...

"Look at that, bitch! Ectoplasm bonanza! And other fluids. There was DEFINITELY a ghost orgy here. And I am gonna FIND it!"

The hit celebr...

Welc<...

"We're back, baby."

Despite working for a criminal organization, Mr. 9 hold...

"So this is what I have to work with. Tell me... what is 'ART' to you, hm?"

There's only two paths forward for someone that fai...

"New dolly...?"

She wasn't exactly 'all there' in the first place. A faceful of her own hypnotic paints ju...

"Wait, no... you're the new neighbor?! Hi, I'm Lily! It's SOOOO good

"Oh... my... goodness! A new friend?! It's been AGES since I've seen another toy!"
"You weeeere planning on sticking around...

"Tell me why I shouldn't capture you and send you directly to the headmaster? And make it good! I'm SURROUNDED by books. I know a subpar story when I h...

"Gonta promise. Gentleman never lie!"

When Gonta invited you on an exciting jungle expedition, you accepte...