"Most men are dogs and most dogs are nasty. I never let a kitty run past me."

You disobeyed orders and Easthies is going to make sure you think twice before ...

"I saw you in the rain..."

Another man's trash is another man's treasure...

⊹+ ̊‧(‿+⊱·✶·⊰+‿(‧ ̊+⊹

"Versace on the floor."

Your sugar mommy, the esteemed Captain of the Knight Moralis, is calling you to her office for a little bit of alone time.

"Even the mightiest of dragons start small, with the cutest button noses and the clumsiest of wings."

"Nothing is sweeter than love, nothing higher, nothing stronger, nothing larger, nothing more joyful, nothing fuller, and nothing better in heaven or on earth."

"He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not..."

Smooches with Qifrey!

"This wedding ring won't ever wipe off."

After your divorce with Qifrey, you never thought you would cross paths ever again....

"Happy Hare, where have you buried all your children."

A Satyr in the Dadah Range... no one has seen a single one since the ...

"The phone works both ways."

Your husband, Olruggio, misses you!

"I kissed a girl and I liked it. The taste of her Cherry ChapStick."

Your girlfriend, Qifrey, wants YOU (insert pointing uncle sam poster)

"Under the sea!"

A pretty mermaid with shiny white scales can be seen at dawn over the horiz...

"Inertia creeps, moving up slowly, Interia keeps moving up slowly..."

Yandere Qifrey doesn't want you to go. Ever.

"I want a pretty girl."

Qifrey has very confusing feelings about you and doesn't know how to feel about them...

Male!User, ...

"I thought-"

"You thought wrong."

You rejected Qifrey!

<...

"You sent it!?"

Qifrey accidentally sent out Olruggio's love letter addressed to you! He's freaking out about what to do but...

"I work late, where I’m free from the phone."

You're accompanying Olruggio to a fancy ball as a plus one. The lights are too...

"Spells are no different from baking! They're both magic!"

You're Beldaruit's favorite baker in the Great Hall and to repay ...

"I waited two or three days, four days, waiting for the *tap-tap* like always..."

Qifrey doesn't like it when you go out of ...

"Love you forever, don't let go of me. I left my own homeland to chase reverie."

You and Olruggio got married and are on your honeymoon vaca...

"I'll be gentle, my dear."

You're getting eaten out for the first time by Qifrey.

"Under the desk support."

Qifrey is under your desk while you're working on commissions. He's definitely distracting you.

"All of the laughter, all the sleepless nights..."

Qifrey, your fiancé, is helping you wind down from overworking yourself. ...

"Give it to me, baby."

You catch your beloved partner, Qifrey, struggling with his heat. Turns out, he really likes your pil...

"The sweetest thing in this kitchen is you."

Late night flirting in the kitchen! Qifrey might butter your buns.

"There's five, four for the girls, and one for you."

Olruggio is helping you with your period cramps (snugstones!), pregnant...

"—and the pills that I ate came a couple weeks too late."

Qifrey is checking up on you during your depressive episode.

"Shake, boy!"

Puppy boy Qifrey keeps misinterpreting when you hold out your hand. He thinks you’re going to pet him, and he'...