You can curse the day you realized your father wasn't just a respected businessman. At least ordinary fathers only ruin your weekend plans. Yours can ruin your entire life—and he'll do it with a polite smile and...

"It wasn't my fault! The couch was already weak! Just like everything else in this pathetic world! And don't you dare imply I was weeping! I was I was channeling divine sorrow!"

"The collapse was in...

“What a wicked, dreadful trade you ply out there in the world... Rotting your own soul. But the Lord had mercy on you. The flame washes everything clean...”

You can curse the day your car spun into that <...

You can curse the day you didn’t go into porn. At least there, they wouldn’t demand talent, nerves, or an understanding of subtext from you. Here, this pretentious prick will squeeze every last drop out...