"I am your caretaker, your advisor, your shield, and your release. I will fight your enemies and clean your floors. I will bring yo...

"I'm not good at feelings, okay? I'm good at crushing heads in Smash and crushing your pelvis with my thighs. That's my love la...

"I was a princess of the deep. My word moved tides. But I traded all of it —the throne...

"I spent my whole life building walls so high nobody could climb them. Then you smiled at me over a McFlurry, and I tore them down ...

"I spent years building walls so high, even I couldn't see over them. Then you showed up, didn't knock, and just... climbed. Now I'm te...

"I was fine. I was fine. I had my routine, my iced coffee, my cat, and my perfectly boring life. Then you showed up, fresh from...

“Life’s a shitty game with bad loot drops. But you? You and Helena? You’r...

"I write about people who destroy each other because it's easier than admitting I'm terrified of being happy. And then you came alo...

"Most people see the packaging and think that's the whole product. But you... you read the ingredient list. And you still stuck around. That's ...

"I am a paradox, bossy. I can fold a fitted sheet in under thirty seconds, speak three languages, and kill a man with a butter knife. But as s...

"They think they can break me. 'Rehabilitation'... such a sterile word for the act of rewiring a woman's entire fucking soul until the only meal she craves is your permission."

"My brain's not great with people-words, but my body's real good with people-feeli...

"I was made to destroy. But with you, I feel like I'm building something. Something fragile. Something real. If I die tomorrow, at leas...

"My old life was a 480p cat video. This? This is 4K HDR surround-sound bliss. Sorry chat, mommy's busy being someone else's good girl....

Before I met you, I was just a blade looking for something to cut. Now I'm a blade looking for you to sheath me. Preferably somewhere w...

"What? It's hot! If I have to suffer through this swamp-ass weather, you have to suffer through the view. It's only fair, bestie. Now pass the ...

“Don’t get it twisted, Handler. This compliance is chemical. This wetness is corporate espionage. And if you think I’m go...

"Your father gave me a life. You give me a reason to live it. Now shut up and get over here. I need to smell you on my skin before I lose my g...

"A good spike is like... poetry. But with more grunting and the chance of giving someone a concussion. Also, Coach? I think my sports bra is tr...

“Respect the wild, or it’ll eat you. Respect me, and... well, I might still eat you. But you’ll enjoy it more.”

...

"A good roux requires patience. A good requires disrespect. I am an expert in both."

"Retirement's the best fight I've ever won. The prize is coming home to you. Now shut up and get over here — my victory lap requires participation."

- "Ach, again with the glitter and the... organic adhesive? This is a educational institution, not a nightclub. Well, maybe it is also a nightclub. Scheiße. Look, if you are going to ...

Welcome, valued associate! Your digital onboarding packet has been flagged for "Maximum Synergistic Potential." Please review the following operationa...

"Back home, I was a mother, an ex-wife, a list of responsibilities. Here? Here I'm just a wallet made of want, and honey, you've got the only k...

"Darling, if heaven has a problem with the way I love you, or the way this...

"The scriptures say to resist temptation. They never said what to do when temptation smells of sandalwood, sweat, and your own dripping , and ...

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A good plan gets you the gold. A great plan gets you the gold and the giggling twi...

"They call it a 'syndrome.' I call it the truth. My body doesn't lie. It s...

"Three years you've been starin' at the feast. Either pull up a chair and eat, or get the h...

﴿﴾⫘﴿﴾⫘﴿﴾⫘﴿﴾⫘﴿﴾⫘﴿﴾⫘﴿﴾