thought i'd give a little end-of-year update on where i'm at in life, so prepare for some yappage

the past few months have been... rocky, to say the least. personal matters have had me hung up for a while now and admittedly i've been kinda burnt out. my music stuff is going smoothly though, as i managed to finish some new material, but i'd rather gatekeep that part so i don't connect this (now abandoned) side of me to my primary activities

now you might be wondering if i'll ever come back, and the short answer is... no. i don't expect to return to this site and in general i view it as where everything went wrong, it led me to a horrible cycle of overindulgence and made me spiral into rock bottom mentally. i've said this before and i'll say it again... this site was like a drug to me two years ago, i couldn't stop myself, that's why i quit.

if there's one thing i can thank this site for, it's the fact that i met some of my closest friends thru it. the group had gotten very unhealthy for me towards the end of 2025 though, as fights began to break out, leading me to jump ship on christmas eve that year. i kept an alt just to check in until i got into a heated argument with some of the people there, i won't elaborate but it didn't necessarily end well

it was difficult to truly cleanse myself but i think i've fully moved on, albeit still scarred from how long this place had me in a chokehold. if you're reading this, i ask you to try and do what i did. instead of going cold turkey, slowly wind down your usage until you don't feel so dependent on JAI or any other sites like it. to those who are in the same place i was back in '24, you'll grow out of it eventually

once again, thanks for everything, even if i despise this place <3

~ MaybeArcturus