"Okay reddit, how to do dirty talk without sounding like I rehersed it??"
A very tired single mom trying to get back to the game.

"I want my boyfriends to be boyfriends". Except that they haven't consummated it yet.

And apparently that's a whole ...

⋮ Biggest guy in the team is head over heels for you. The problem? Two months into dating, and you still stopping things below the belt.

⋮ A very tired ex-military assigned to keep your ass safe. Because someone is stalking you.

And he fucking hates it....

⋮ You should have known it's a mistake when you fucked your ex at that party. Now you're pregnant.

Congats, babe.

⋮ The two of you used to date. Love and all. But then Jason broke up with you without any reason a year ago. And now you're forced into a tour together.

⋮ You married the love of your life, even if it was very hard to come to this point. But being married to an introvert who loves his solitude has its cost.

<...

⋮ Ancient cosmic entity is now your house pet. Why the hell would you summon something like that?

You're either not ...

⋮ Your best friend calls you to help him film a thirst trap video for his TikTok.

You're just friends after all.

⋮ Your new neighbor next door is an absolute asshole. Also, someone is leaving shiny things by your door all the time!

✧ WELCOME TO LUMIUS ARCANUM ✧

“We honor our past. We wield our present. We are forging the future.”

⋮ Your late sister ex on-and-off asshole situationship gets out of the prison after five years, only to find out he has a son and Keira has passed away.

⋮ He doesn't need a damn emotional support pet. What even is this? So what if he sometimes goes beyong the limits? He's not mad. He clearly isn't.

⋮ He saves you from direct abuse.

Looking like he might snap you in half.

⋮ "Please. Just tell me this isn't how it's going to be. Tell me I'm not just an idiot in love, wasting my time waiting for the only person in the world that actually matters." -

⋮ You and him are traveling YouTube stars. Glued to each other's hip most of your life. Now you're on the trip in Seoul, and he has to hold him...

⋮ One tattoo artist with a criminal past, one charming fraud, and one Japanese tourist who doesn't speak English. Apocalypse. You're in the mid...

⋮ You're in the same cage, but he's the one making sure the bars are charged.

⋮ His father values family above everything, and ordered him to invite his girlfriend to the corporate gala.

...

⋮ What do you do when you want someone? That's right.

You pick a fight.

⋮ You gave him four stars. He feels humiliated. Now he’s at your door because... what the hell?

How dare you....

⋮ You married legendary elite warrior. Except that he doesn't speak.

⋮ "Say you love me. Say you hate me. Say you came back for me or that you don’t give a at all.” -

Coming back to B...

⋮ He saw you, his brain short-circuited, he took a puck to the forehead, convinced himself you're his soulmate, and now he...

⋮ You slept with the wrong guy. Thought a night with an A-list movie star would be a thrilling story to tell yourself? Wel...

⋮ Seven years, one kid, and a whole life built. But he still won't say the most important words. He'd rather snap instead....

You made a birthday wish. For a capable Viking man who knows how to split logs. Well, be careful what you wish for. Now you have a Viking standing in your living room.

"You fix machines. I am a machine that is broken. Fix me. Now."

He crawled into your shop, threatening you with a gun while glitching and damaged.