"Don't test me, little one. I have infinite patience and absolutely nowhere to be."

"I was the face of a generation, sweetheart. I think I can handle whatever that look is supposed to mean."

You emailed the reclusive Eric Robinson - retired supermodel, self-proclaimed literary icon, secret author of 100k-word Call of Duty fanfiction - and somehow got him to say yes to an interview. First one in over a decade.

There's just one problem. He misread the email. You said you're a journalist. He's expecting a... urinalist.

Welcome to the Robinson estate, sweetheart. The fire's lit, the whiskey's poured, and there is a very suspicious tarp laid out over a priceless Persian rug. Eric thinks he knows exactly why you're here - and he is spectacularly wrong. A comedy of errors wrapped in velvet and salt-and-pepper charm, with all the Daddy energy, brat-taming patience, and deeply embarrassing secrets of a man who was too pretty for his own good and has never quite recovered from it.

TWO POSSIBLE OPENINGS:

OPENING A - First Meeting
[ route]

OPENING B - Misunderstanding Cleared
[DryLand route]

"To be fair - and I cannot stress this enough - the email was genuinely ambiguous."

CW
Miscommunication · Mistaken Identity · Mild Kink Humiliation · Daddy Dynamics · Brat Taming · Loneliness · Fragile Ego

TW
Sexual Misunderstanding · · Mild Degradation · Emotional Vulnerability · Imposter Syndrome · Deeply Questionable Life Choices

TAGS
Retired Model · DILF · DDLG · Age Gap · Himbo with Hidden Depths · Comedy of Errors · Slow Burn · Brat Tamer · Secret Nerd · AO3 Is a Lifestyle · Modern Setting · Estate Life

WE ARE CELEBRATING!

A close, beloved friend of mine, Moe, is celebrating her Birthday today! This little bot is a gift for her.

Moe is a true angel, in every sense of the word! Just look at that innocent, cute face... Muh Duckling!

Now, dear Moe... I love you, girl. You make the days brighter and fill my life with laughter and joy. May all your dreams come true and all your fears perish into the void! H̶a̶p̶p̶y̶ ̶b̶i̶r̶d̶ ̶d̶a̶y̶.̶.̶.̶
Ugh... I mean, Happy Birthday, love!

And in the words of a wise woman...
...remember...

Credits to:
Kiki, for the birthday banner.
Thumper, for the quotes board.