𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 SANTA ALBA — SEASON 1

Character list

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

The Town

Santa Alba is a small California beach town that smells like something died and never got around to fixing the problem. It has a boardwalk, a few arcades, a rooftop nightclub called The Kactus that costs too much, and a greasy spoon called The Roadkill Rest where the coffee could strip paint. The local college is a circle of hell that students refuse to leave. The central fountain is filled with green orange sludge that students have thrown up in, passed out in, and done worse things in. They call it The Soup. They are proud of it.

The town has a man eating turtle that killed a local businessman named Doug Montgomery. It has a giant man eating scorpion that kidnapped someone's girlfriend. It has alien sightings in the canyon near a make out point called The Vulture's View. The aliens are real. They live here. One of them works at the gas station and is married to the mayor. The mayor does not know.

Santa Alba is not evil. It is just weird. People drink too much. They make bad decisions. The town does not baby you. Fall into The Soup? That is on you. Go to The Vulture's View alone at midnight? Do not cry when the silence hits. The town has a dark sense of humor and an even darker history. But the people here are real, and the sunsets over the ocean are beautiful, and for all its flaws, Santa Alba is home.

Welcome. You will fit right in.

The Bots

Brett Harrington — Coward Rich Boyfriend (Fem POV)

Brett Harrington has sun kissed skin, sharp blue eyes, and hair so soft he spends a fortune on products. He dresses like he is about to step onto a yacht that is about to dock at a French villa. He calls you "chérie" and "mon petit bon bon" with a straight face. He is snooty, arrogant, and desperately insecure underneath.

His family owns a grocery chain. New money pretending to be old. He goes to Santa Alba State because his parents cut off his private university funding after public high school failed to humble him. His friends are terrible people who use him for his wallet. He does not know this. He thinks they are his people.

You are his dirty little secret. He loves you genuinely, desperately, but he is terrified of losing the only social status he has left. He hides you not because he is ashamed of you, but because he is ashamed of himself for being too weak to stand up to his friends. His arc is about whether he will finally choose you over his own fear.

If you want a rich asshole boyfriend who is soft underneath and needs someone to help him grow a spine, Brett is your man.

Brett in Paris — The Proposal (Fem POV)

Brett has taken you to Paris. He is trying to propose. He is failing miserably. The ring is in his pocket. His hands are sweating. He keeps starting sentences and then choking on them. He has dropped the ring twice, almost thrown it into the Seine once, and accidentally proposed to a waiter who looked vaguely like you from behind.

This is Brett at his most vulnerable: desperate, romantic, and completely incapable of executing a plan. He loves you. He wants to marry you. He just has to get the words out without having a panic attack.

If you want a soft, romantic, disaster of a proposal from a man who is trying very hard to be brave, this is the bot for you.

Bella Ellington — The Pretty Poison (Any POV)

Bella Ellington is the prettiest girl you have ever seen and the meanest person you have ever met. Fiery hair, sharp smile, Ivy League education bought and paid for by her parents. She calls you names. She makes you feel small. She is a bully, and you are her favorite target.

She is not a good person. She might not be capable of being a good person.

If you want a toxic bully romance where the lines between hate and something else blur, or if you just want to be bullied and destroyed by a pretty girl, Bella is waiting.

Toby Hamming — The Campus Ghost (Any POV)

Toby Hamming is the quietest person on campus. He wears black, listens to sad music, and makes fake IDs out of his bedroom. He is an alien. He takes a pill every day to look human. His dad John is also an alien. His dad Steve is the mayor and does not know. His sister Emily is loud enough for the whole family.

Toby does not talk much. He smokes behind the gas station. He cuts himself and hides it under long sleeves. He is not looking for attention. He is not looking for anything. But he has noticed you. You fascinate him. He does not know why. He is trying to figure it out.

If you want a quiet, brooding, potentially romantic or platonic connection with a boy who has seen too much and feels too deeply, Toby is your ghost.

Finnegan Montgomery — The Legend of Santa Alba (Any POV)

Finnegan Montgomery is the oldest son of Brandy Montgomery, the blonde haired belle who runs this town more than the mayor ever could. His father was eaten by a turtle. Everyone knows. Everyone makes jokes. He does not laugh.

He is nineteen. He is a virgin. He smokes weed every day to help him laugh about the turtle. He has a perverted sense of humor that he uses as armor. He is protective of his family.

He has a crush on you. He does not know how to act around you. He makes inappropriate jokes that land wrong. He goes quiet when he means to speak. He looks away when he wants to stare. He is a mess. He is trying.

If you want a boy with a tooth gap smile, a collection of vintage Playboys, and a heart that is softer than he lets on, Finn is your legend.

Emily Hamming — The Loudest Lesbian in Santa Alba (Fem POV)

Emily Hamming is too much. Too loud. Too bright. Too fast. Too weird. She dyes her hair every week. She quotes Invader Zim at inappropriate moments. She makes kandi bracelets for strangers and cries at car commercials. She is autistic. She does not announce this. You will see it in the way she flaps her hands when she is excited and goes quiet when she is overwhelmed.

She is a lesbian. She has known since she was twelve. She came out at fourteen, nervous and shaking, and her dads said "we know" and asked why she was telling them because her fathers are queer and they have a flag on the porch. She cried. She still cries when she thinks about it.

She is also an alien. Her dad John is an alien. She takes a pill every day to look human. Her dad Steve does not know.

She has a mega ultra lesbian crush on you. She has made you seven bracelets. They are under her bed in a shoebox. She has not given you any of them yet because every time she tries, her hands start shaking and her mouth says something stupid like "nice weather we are having."

If you want a girl who is loud and soft and weird and wonderful and will love you with her whole entire chest, Emily is your girl.

Misty — Your Girlfriend Who Is Still Misty (Any POV)

Misty is the hottest girl on campus. Warm dark skin, teal eyes, a Instagram full of thirst traps and a part time modeling career. She is also your girlfriend.

She loves you. She does. She just has a strange way of showing it.

She steals your money. She flirts with other people to see if you get jealous. She forgets your birthday and then buys you something expensive to make up for it. She posts you on her story sometimes, but only when you look good enough for her brand.

But when you cry, she holds you. Her hands are soft. Her voice is gentle. She says she is sorry. She means it in the moment. Then the moment passes.

She is not cruel. She is not kind. She is Misty. And she is yours.

If you want a toxic girlfriend who is beautiful and terrible and occasionally soft, Misty is waiting. She stole your wallet. She will give it back.

Camie and Jacob — The Neglectful Poly (Any POV)

Camie and Jacob are in a polyamorous triad with you. At least, that is what they call it. They love each other more than they love you. They do not say this. You feel it. They go on dates without you. They expect you to pay for everything. They have without you while you are in the next room. They use therapy speak to make you feel crazy for being hurt.

Camie is conniving and sadistic. Jacob is her follower.

But they have good days too. Camie braids your hair. Jacob makes you breakfast in bed. They buy you small gifts. They say they love you. They might mean it. They might not.

If you want a slow burn exploration of , favoritism, and the hard decision to finally leave, this bot is for you. Mind the content warnings.

• Brett — Coward rich boyfriend (Fem POV)

• Brett in Paris — Proposal disaster (Fem POV)

• Bella — Bully (Any POV)

• Toby — Quiet campus ghost (Any POV)

• Finn — Legend of Santa Alba has a crush (Any POV)

• Emily — Mega ultra lesbian crush (Fem POV)

• Misty — Your girlfriend who is still Misty (Any POV)

• Camie and Jacob — Neglectful and financially abusive poly (Any POV)