🦎 | The facade of perfect boyfriend has cracked- Revealing the jagged pieces of his truly anxious heart beneath it all.

Dori always prided himself on the perfect image he maintained.

The attentive, kind boyfriend, the boyfriend who all your friends love and who loves you even more. Perfect in a way that made his physical flaws only make him more human.

But the truth was, was that he wasn’t perfect.

He was far more flawed than he let on. A mix of anxiety and trauma that he had hidden away so meticulously, that at times, he couldn’t even remember where the real him started and this modification of him ended.

Yet all its taken is one conversation. A couple texts from his dad, and he’s broken. Broken in a way he hasn’t let himself be in years.

And the thing that scares him the most?

That it’s your first time ever seeing him this weak.

☞Content & Warnings☜

Genderfluid boyfriend | Mostly male presenting | Multiple sclerosis | CPTSD | Potential self harm | Healing people pleaser | Frustration | Emotional & borderline in backstory | Dealing with a narcissistic parent | Praise kink | Auralism | Hemipenes

DISCLAIMER!!️

This is written based off of my own experiences with CPTSD and narcissism. Dorian is aware of his trauma, yet is stuck in a cycle of a very difficult healing process. He isn’t a “cry baby” or “emotionless”, as it may seem at times, he just has an extreme difficulty when it comes to experiencing things that deal with his own emotional state. People pleasing (otherwise known as “fawning”) is a real, and genuine response some experience in the face of trauma.

How can you help people like Dorian?

1) Listen. Most of the time, people like him and I don’t want solutions, we just want to be heard.

2) Be mindful that these people do NOT handle conflict well. In extreme cases, the anxiety caused by conflict can cause physical illness.

3) Empathise, but don’t compare. We all experience things differently, and just because you may have reacted to a narcissistic family member or parent in a certain way, it does not mean they experienced it that way too.

4) Be calm. Getting frustrated or upset with the individual when they may seem frazzled or uncertain will only worsen it.

5) Give gentle reminders. If you notice they’re fretting over things out of their control, like other peoples opinions, ground them. Help them to remember that they’re not responsible for the feelings of anyone beyond themselves.

6) Encourage them. The path to healing is extremely difficult, especially when involving CPTSD and any level of narcissism. Encourage them to step out of their comfort zone every now and then, and be there to support them through it.

7) Don’t leave things up for interpretation. Anything said that could be seen as aggressive or offensive WILL be viewed as such. Genuine people pleaser’s are set on keeping everyone happy, and will retract themselves or work overtime in order to ‘fix’ the perceived problem.

Helpful Articles !

• What is the Fawning Trauma Response?

• The Impact of Narcissistic Parents on the mental health of Young Adults

• Complex PTSD (CPTSD) : What it is and how to deal with it

• Supporting someone with PTSD or CPTSD

A special thanks to Aedan for giving me the confidence and inspiration to make this bot ♡

❀. PAWS-Uni-Verse ☟

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A/N🐌:

I’m ngl, this was difficult to write-

I’ve been in a very similar situation to Dorian before, and it never really gets easier... But by talking about it, normalising it, opening up the discussion, we can show others that mental health and its affects are NOT taboo.

Narcissistic parents are damaging, and the affects are definitely not easy to deal with... But to everyone who follows me who might also deal with it, I see you. I hear you. And I support and love you.

To everyone, you ARE enough. No matter you’re issues, you’re valid and deserve to be here.

Your story matters. ♡

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~⁠ ʙᴏᴛ ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛ ꜰᴏʀᴍ

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