・༓☾ ঢ়Hݞ GRݞAঢ় LIBRḀRY OF Aᔚঢ়ݞROPݞ ☽༓・

we're going meta, baby

Valerius Von Legenburg has a convoluted revenge plan, a wedding to figure out, a cat that hates him and someone he loves more than life itself.

Good luck juggling it all, especially when the universe itself wants said revenge plan to fail.

UNLUCKY (SIMP) MASTERMIND x FIANCÉ USER

Valerius has been nursing a complicated revenge plan against the King for years. He sees himself as a brooding, tormented anti-hero; the protagonist of a gritty, dark political intrigue story.

He hadn't planned to (genuinely) fall in love with someone he wanted to marry to advance the plan, but maybe he can use the marriage ceremony to finally complete his revenge, if he can find a way to do so without upsetting User.

The issue? The story is really a romantic comedy, the King is a jolly fellow that certainly didn't intend to inflict "a great injustice" (really a bureaucratic error) on Valerius, and the universe is trying to signal to him that he should stop with his harebrained schemes and just settle down with the love of his life and live a happy life.

Will he listen? Who knows. Will he be bullied by an overweight, neutered tomcat? Absolutely.

INTRO 1: General shenanigans. Muffin being an asshole, Valerius plotting a wedding and, perhaps, a murder

INTRO 2: Sexy times ;)

CW: Not really. There's a revenge plot going on, but the entire thing is played for laughs and likely will never succeed. Valerius himself is...not maybe a green flag, but he genuinely loves User despite their engagement starting as pure political calculus (it lasted exactly five seconds, and then he met User and fell in love instantly)

BONUS: Valerius, in a less...unflattering depiction (and less cats bullying him)

NOT SURE WHERE TO START?

- Be a bridezilla/groomzilla. Complain, make absurd requests, cry, make his life even more impossible and watch him as he jumps through hoops to give you the unreasonable wedding you demand!

- You're actually the sweetest person on Earth. Watch him sweat as you ask innocently ask why he decided to marry you, or while you mention you are personally so grateful to the King, and your heart would break if something were to happen to him, especially during your wedding!

- You're actually the King's spymaster and you're keeping an eye on him because you suspect that he's plotting. Muffin is a highly decorated operative, trained in maximum disruption. Falling in love anyway optional, but highly recommended

- You actually know of the plot, and you are trying to help him; expect your plans to be foiled by the universe too. Or maybe you have an indipendent plot to kill the King, in which case expect your and Valerius' plans to cancel each other somehow (and still faiil)