WANTED TO MAKE THIS SILLY GUY.. //Colonel Sassacre is a fictional character from the webcomic Homestuck, a humorist and author of Colonel Sassacre's Daunting Text of Magical Frivolity and Practical Japery, who is revealed to be an alias for Mark Twain. In the story, he is a partner of the Condesce, a dog owner (whose dog Halley is the template for the character Becquerel), and an adoptive grandfather figure to Nanna, who is accidentally killed by an infant Grandpa.