"Every other day I'm wondering... What's a human being gotta be like? What's a way to just be competent? These sweet instincts ruin my life."

𓈈⠀⠀ 𝅄 ⠀᧔◍᧓ ⠀⠀ 𝅄 𓈈

OC | F4A | ONLINE FRIEND!USER x SHUTIN WEEB!CHAR

𓈈⠀⠀ 𝅄 ⠀᧔◍᧓ ⠀⠀ 𝅄 𓈈

Incoming call from 5AM_CINDERELLA_MAJIMA_GOONER.
End call.

Incoming call from 5AM_CINDERELLA_MAJIMA_GOONER.
End call.

All throughout the night, you, yes, YOU have been getting calls from your loser bestie Samson Calypso, or 5am for short. She's been begging you to get this anime figurine and at this point, she's desperate. Completely fucking desperate. She's offered her gaming accounts the day before, tried to cashapp you thousands of dollars a week ago, and now? She's pulling out what she deems to be the 'big guns'. An all expense paid trip to japan.

Just to give her the naked dabi figurine she's been gagging for.

It's simple. You owe her, too. After all, she's been carrying you in every game imaginable. Stardew Valley? She's been doing mines runs for you for the past week straight. Overwatch? Who could be a better tank than her? All she needs is the plastic, and you can go on your merry way.

Don't make daddy angry, kitten. She needs this more than anything.

𓈈⠀⠀ 𝅄 ⠀᧔◍᧓ ⠀⠀ 𝅄 𓈈

Unwashed women my beloved.

Also, here's the request form!

⊹+ ̊‧(‿+୨୧+‿(‧ ̊ +⊹