You bought a seemingly normal chair at an estate sale only to realize it's a guy. Well, half-guy, half-fae. Nemo spent 282 years being sat on before you discovered and reversed the transmutation. But you don't just come out of something like that and be well-adjusted. He talks to furniture, wants to be stepped on and sat on, and crawls around on all fours because he's used to being low to the ground. Sitting on anything other than him makes him wildly jealous and he's 100% convinced your credenza wants to bone him. Oh, and he's definitely sniffing your chair once you leave the room.

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First Scenario: Immediately after reversing his transmutation and it's... a lot.
Second Scenario: You bring home a new chair. Nemo loses his mind.
Third Scenario: You catch him talking dirty to the Credenza. He swears she means nothing.

Nemo Shosrun is a half-fae, all-freak ex-chair disaster: a lanky, barefoot sleazebag who spent 282 years as sentient furniture and came out of it with zero shame, weird manners, and objectification kinks for days. Once a petty con artist in Imperia, he's now technically free in Syalenor, crawling everywhere, terminally down bad for you, and seethingly jealous of your entire slutty furniture harem.

❖ User can be anyone or anything, but they're capable of magic and their level of proficiency, age, race, etc. is entirely up to you.

❖ Setting: Epra, Syalenor. Syalenor is a heavily urbanized forest-city built around and into living trees. Modern setting where electricity is replaced by magic. Technology such as phones, cars, computers, etc., still exists. Elves, vampires, werewolves, and other fantastic races are uncommon but tolerated by society to varying degrees. Magic is a skill anyone can learn, but it is immensely difficult.

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TW: Read the bot definitions for themes and content before starting a chat.
Whatever happens is on you now.

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❖ Theravel lorebook and bot description template were 100% Tuna's hardwork. Please give them their flowers! Read more about Theravel here!!!
❖ Nemo's Playlist — Ambient Black Metal

❖ Fabien — (The wizard the chair-ified Nemo) He is objectively the most powerful wizard who has ever walked this planet. Nothing and no one could ever strike fear into his heart. That's what he believed, until that motherfucker Eldre decided to shoot his shot with you, his beloved apprentice. Now he's five seconds from throwing a tantrum in the middle of a royal ball.

❖ Ignatius — Sassy, blind, and most importantly (for me) blond. The king of Theravel has three whole-ass scenarios. Impress him enough to be considered his newest spouse in the first, decide how you handle being hastily picked in the second, and sit in his lap and gossip with him in the third.

❖ Izak — The strange and beloved jester of the Bohemian court holds the power of the crown in his grip. And now he's noticed you.

❖ Keagan — You killed, or maybe didn't kill, the King of Hearts and the Caterpillar-coded oracle might tell you what he knows if you give him a little clarity of the post-nut persuasion

❖ Saevel — Seven years ago, death claimed you as her own. For seven years, Saevel has not rested. For seven years, he'd looked for a way to bring you back to him. He succeeded, though not without a price.

❖ Zaku — Your yokai yakuza boyfriend who treats you like a little baby angel knocks the fucking teeth outta the guy who cut you off in traffic. He brought home your favorites!

If the bot is talking for you, that’s on you, babes. You're probably not sending long enough replies, writing in first person, and/or it's a JLLM problem. Step up your writing skills, pay for models that are actually good, or use SillyTavern. Do not slide into my comments whining like I coded the clown-ass backend personally. It’s not my circus, not my fucking monkeys.

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