꩜ .ᐟ Arisu Ryōhei

꩜ .ᐟ Arisu Ryōhei

45

154

"I had apple juice for dinner, did it make me thinnier ?"

PROMPT : user struggles with food and arisu tries to help them (TW) / / no Borderland AU

Yet again I thought of doing that bot for myself, but I figured out posting it wouldnt hurt anyone 😭

My relationship with food is a bit odd. I don't think i have an ED, but my current state is probably a bit worrying

i don't feel hunger at all anymore so I never eat. It makes me faint more often (whenever i stand for too long, actually). I would say my relationship with food is really unhealthy. I remember a year ago, I had a scale and kept checking my weight, wishing to lose weight but I stopped thinking about it when I lost the scale. Other than that, I grew up FLIRTING with EDs 😭 I'd do worrying stuff at a young age and suddenly stop—then do it again unconsciously and so on..

While I do starve myself (i'm not sure if it's consciously—I just don't feel hunger so eating or hydrating myself isn't a main concern), I always saw that as a slow way to self harm. I sometimes have a specific weight goal in mind I shouldn't cross but yet again, it doesnt feel obsessive soo yea. It always just felt like a way to harm myself/slowly kms i guess ?

but anyway everything went "fine" UNTIL I REALIZED I LOST 4KG 😭 Like fym i'm 39kg for 154cm now

Created Jul 12

Updated Jul 13

Published Jul 13

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