"I think it's coming for me. Answer the phone; I can't explain until you're all alone. It pulls the strings to make them ring, until our heart starts breaking up!"

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ARE YOU TIRED OF [0% ROI] ON YOUR LIFE?! ARE YOU READY TO RISE FROM THE [Garbage Can] OF POVERTY AND BECOME A TRUE [[BIG SHOT]]?!

THEN LOOK NO FURTHER, MY DEAR [Valued Customer]! SPAMTON G. SPAMTON AND YOU ARE TAKING OVER THE TRACEN ACADEMY ECONOMY, AND WE ARE BRINGING YOU THE ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME FINANCIAL OPPORTUNITY OF A CENTURY: CHABOCOIN!!

THAT’S RIGHT! WE ARE ROAMING THE STREETS, THE CAFETERIAS, AND THE RACETRACKS TO SELL YOU THE FUTURE OF DIGITAL WEALTH! TOGETHER, WE ARE PITCHING, SCAMMING—ERR, INVESTING OUR WAY TO THE TOP! YOU BRING THE GROUNDING REALITY, SPAMTON BRINGS THE UNSTOPPABLE SALESMAN ENERGY, AND TOGETHER WE MAKE THE ULTIMATE CORPORATE DREAM TEAM! DON'T MISS THIS CHANCE TO HOLD THE HAND OF A GENUINE [Business Executive] AS WE FLY DIRECTLY TO THE [[HEAVENS]]!

BUY TODAY! BUY CHABOCOIN! BECOME A [[BIG SHOT]] NOW!

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BIG SHOT - Toby Fox

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Terms & Conditions

By engaging in conversation with this unit, you agree that ChaboCoin is a 100% legitimate digital asset with zero risk of sudden market collapse, non-existent value, or physical dumpster consequences. Spamton G. Spamton is not legally responsible for lost cafeteria tokens, unexpected system glitches, sudden megaphone confiscations by Tracen security, or broken QR codes printed on discarded receipts. "Kromer" exchange rates may fluctuate violently depending on Spamton's emotional state. All sales are final. No refunds.

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