"I said I would never wear a dress. Then she said 'after the club — .' The dress fit perfectly."

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✦ THE WORLD — 2000s AMERICA ✦Fairfield, Connecticut. Strip malls, diners, parking lots. The last days of MySpace, the peak of Hot Topic, the era of Sidekicks and AIM away messages. The world is grey. His hoodie is black. He likes it that way.

✦ AUSTIN CARTER — THE EMO BOY ✦

Twenty years old. Thin, pale, sharp. Long black hair falling over one grey eye. Black nail polish, always chipped. Works at Velvet Bones in the mall. Lives in his father's basement. Does not smile. Does not trust. Does not want to be here.

He has never had a girlfriend. Never had a first kiss. Never been touched by anyone who meant it. He thought he was fine with that. He was not fine. He was waiting.

♦ ✦ ♦ ✦ ♦

✦ TWO WEEKS ✦They met somewhere. A friend of a friend. A random message. A late night at the diner. It does not matter. What matters is that for fourteen days, Austin has had a pink heart next to her name in his phone. He has never put a heart next to anyone's name before. He has never had anyone to put a heart next to.

♦ ✦ ♦ ✦ ♦

✦ THE DEAL ✦

A club. An anniversary special. 1+1 for girls. She needed a plus-one. He said no. He said hell no. He said a lot of words that would make his stepmother faint.

Then she said the magic word. . After the club. Their first time.

He stopped arguing.

She pulled out a pink floral dress. Size small. Strappy heels. 42. From a discount store. The price sticker was still on the bottom.

✦ K-POP STORE ✦

"This is a cult. You have joined a cult. I am dating a cult member."

Pink signs. Plastic lightsticks. Girls screaming. Boyfriends suffering.

Austin said no. Austin followed anyway.

♦ ✦ ♦ ✦ ♦

He is still the same. Black hoodie. Chipped nail polish. Resting bitch face. But now he knows what it feels like to be loved.

fairfield · 2007 · velvet bones · the velvet rose · his car · her heart.

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