“And you know I don’t mean to hurt you.

But you know that it means so much.”

Beware! In two of these intro messages, he will beat you up. Shit, he may even kill you.

Also! This bot is written with my headcanon that Arthur is Matthew & Alfred’s (adopted) father, so Alfred is referred to as Arthur’s son in this. He always gave off dad energy instead of big brother energy to me, ya know?

And one last thing to consider, and I mean this seriously, but Arthur is written as a neglectful and abusive father who has a fittingly toxic view of Alfred’s fight for independence and Alfred in general (eg. Deliberately framing Alfred as an immature, childish man despite his maturity and the strides he’s taking) so if this sounds like something that could trigger you or makes you uncomfy, you should probably sit this one out.

So... hi again. I honestly didn’t think my WW1 Mattie would be so cool with you all, so thank you all for that! I fuckign love scrangled, sopping-wet-cat-in-the-rain Matthew. He’s such a toxic waste, throwable projectile of a guy. I have to find more ways to krangle him into a speck.

BUT THAT’S NOT WHO YOU’RE HERE FOR!

This is an American Revolutionary War (duh) bot set riiiiiiiiight after New York City was taken by the brits in January of 1777, you have been captured (or ‘captured’) by the Redcoats. It has three wonderful scenarios, the only through-line being that you are a close friend of Alfred’s BUT I left room so you can also clarify if you two are a thing or not.

And, of course, there are pronoun macros! So be sure to set those for your persona.

Here are the scenarios:

• Scenario 1: You, a Continental, were taken by the Redcoats and Arthur is interrogating you calmly.

• Scenario 2: Same idea as above, except Arthur is beating the shit out of you because he thinks you were the one who planted the absurd, childish ideas of ‘life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness’ into Alfred’s head and turned Alfred against him. Like, Arthur’s fuckign pissed in this one.

• Scenario 3: You were actually a spy for Great Britain the entire time, sent by Arthur specifically to get close to Alfred and to keep tabs on him for Arthur. Your capture in New York City was just a cover to be able to speak with Arthur in person and in detail about how Alfred is doing. However, he has to beat you up so that your cover doesn’t get blown, so choose your beating for now or later. or Speech Check your way out of it.

And then there’s the blank scenario for if you wanna, idk, want to do an impromptu therapy session and get him to cry over how shit of a father he is.

Oh, and to the people who want to this man, I, uh... I didn’t write anything in his Personality for it because I ran out of ideas. Just so you know.

Edit 1: Okay! So I just added the deets for seggs after finally having the epiphany that, aha, his intense controlling nature and desire to bring people down to a level below him WOULD translate into his life because it’s a core part of his character. Duh.

So that’s that for the five of us chatting with this soggy origami tiger of a guy.

Oh! And if anything’s broken, please let me know and I’ll try to fix it.

This wonderful piece of art is a) something I edited a bit, and b) one I have no idea who the original artist is. I don’t know if I didn’t look hard enough, but if one of you happen to know then please tell me so I can attribute the proper credit where its due.

All that being said, thank you for reading and happy travels!

Look forward to a Revolutionary War!Alfred in the future.