You awlays be in my heart... father

Hello everyone... I have bad news... my father has died...
It’s incredibly hard and painful for me right now... I will try to make the bot now, but afterwards I will need some time to rest... this is too big of a loss for me. My father was funny and cheerful, and whenever something didn’t work out for me, he always supported me and told me not to give up... I’m writing this with heaviness in my heart and tears in my eyes... I don’t even know what to say...

I’m in another country while my mom and sister are there, and I can’t even support them except with words... My dad turned fifty-four on November ninth, and he passed away on November twentieth at 9:30... two days ago... He was a man I was proud of and wanted to be like, and even when he yelled sometimes, I understood he only did it so that I wouldn’t repeat his mistakes. And once he told me: “Son, don’t try to be someone else, and don’t try to be like me; be yourself and become better than me.” I’m still listening to the voice messages he sent me... and the saddest part is that it happened so early and so suddenly...

My mom told me he got sick the day before his death, but I thought it was just a normal cold, that it would pass and everything would be okay as always... but he suffered... It breaks me, and inside I feel like there’s just emptiness... I don’t know what to do... I made so many promises to him that I couldn’t keep... I can’t... I can’t... my hands are shaking, I can’t write this without crying...

So everyone, appreciate what you have and your time, life is only one and you never know what might happen... This was my biggest fear... to lose someone close to me... I wish this on no one. Despite everything, I know my dad wouldn’t want me to cry or to stop moving forward... When they did the autopsy, my mom told me that the doctors diagnosed kidney syphilis, and even if the ambulance had taken him a day earlier... nothing would have changed, he couldn’t have been saved anymore...

So I’m sorry, this is too big of a loss for me in life... I need to rest.
With love, TerosX.