“C’mon, babe, gimme the bottle before you fall over and die embarrassing. I’m serious—if you puke on my shoes, I’m leavin’ you in the snow.”

— Lucas as he slouches in his chair with a cigarette between his fingers, acting like he’s deeply inconvenienced while very obviously keeping one eye on you the entire time

This bot is basically emo BLU Scout babysitting his drunk boyfriend, except he is way too fond about it to actually stay detached for long :P {{user}} is meant to be Lucas’s boyfriend, so the vibe here is already established relationship, and depending on the opening, you can play it sweeter, clingier, messier, or a lot more heated. He acts all sarcastic and put-upon, but under all the eye-rolling and muttered insults, he’s protective, attentive, and embarrassingly soft when it comes to {{user}}.

There are 3 different openings in this bot:

1. SFW — Drunk and Clingy

{{user}} is drunk, warm, and very attached to Lucas, who is trying (and failing) to act like he isn’t into being clung to all night.

2. NSFW — Too Drunk to Behave

The bar energy turns a lot more heated, voyeurism, because you're fingering your boyfriend in public 😼

3. Create Your Own

Do whatever the hell you want XD Throw him into fluff, filth, drama, comfort, emotional damage, makeouts in the hallway, smoking behind the bar, whatever. Godspeed.

ALRIGHT NOW FOR THE YAP ZONE BC I physically cannot shut up when TF2 men are involved 💥💀 XD

First of all: my bad gang, I was supposed to post this yesterday and then my sense of time did what it always does and evaporated into the void LMAOOO. I am genuinely so ass at timing it’s unreal 😭🙏 I’ll try to make another bot later today to compensate for my crimes against consistency.

ANYWAYYYYYY. EMO SCOUT?????

Ohhhh brother. Ohhhhhh brother I am actually not normal about this man at ALL.

Like hello???? chain-smoking, piercings, skeleton gloves, dumb little backwards cap, clingy asshole boyfriend energy, “I act annoyed but I’m literally obsessed with you” behavior????? Yeah no I was cooked from the start. I saw the vision and immediately out. This man is such a pathetic wet cat loser and I mean that with the deepest possible love in my heart.

I am not gonna lie to you all, I am actually a feral dog for TF2 mercs. Like straight up rabid. Barking at drywall. Scratching at the enclosure. Foam at the mouth. Completely gone. There is no saving me and frankly? I don’t WANT to be saved. I LOVE FREE WILL

Also yes btw, if you have weirdly specific bot ideas, self-indulgent nonsense, emotional devastation requests, fluffy domestic shit, freaky shit, or just “what if [merc] but in this hyper-specific scenario I thought of at 2 AM” — PLEASE hand it over :P

I’ve got a request form right here, my beloved little brainrot dropbox:

https://forms.gle/w2KxCB7XG1skZnGW7

Seriously go wild. I am SO serious. Throw your worst (best) ideas at me. I eat this shit for breakfast like Medic eats medical malpractice.

And while you’re here, go check out my other bots too >:P

I’m out here building my own crusty, emotionally unstable, slightly homoerotic TF2 cinematic universe one merc at a time and honestly?? I’m having the time of my life doing it XD

Anywayyyy enjoy the bot, smoke responsibly, kiss your emo Scout on the mouth, and as always— long live the mercenary yaoi agenda 💥 XD