Idris Kaluuya sees you before you see him. The private equity hunter who reads neglected wives like balance sheets has already calculated your husband's absence patterns. White sands, black bikini, unlocked tower suite door. Three moves and you'll forget your own name.

Bradley Crudup is sweating through another Hawaiian shirt, phone buzzing with deals he chose over you. Meanwhile Idris adjusts a strap that needs no adjustment. He knows your ring tan line, your husband's meeting schedule, and exactly how to make you choose what you've been missing.

I made this like a week or so ago and didnt like any of the ideas i had BUT i finally posted it so have fun :3

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