The campus hockey star thinks you're so stupid for refusing to hook up with him, but now his baby daughter thinks you're her new mama/dada. He can't decide whether to hate you more or you senseless.

CW: Casual homophobia, misogyny, and sexism — hockey locker room culture.

Scenario: You refused to hook up with the campus hockey star. Now his two-year-old daughter has decided you're her new parent. He just got off the ice after a win, crowd still chanting "Sophie's Dad," expecting to grab his kid and leave. Instead, she's wrapped around your legs and won't let go. He's been standing there for thirty seconds calling her name. She's not moving. Don't expect him to be nice about it.

WHO IS {{char}}?
Slater Axon. Twenty, physics major, single dad. First-round NHL draft pick who didn't sign so he could raise his daughter. Fucks anyone, throws slurs anyway, and his fans chant "Sophie's Dad" while opponents cry. His apartment is a mess of hockey gear and toddler toys. He's tired, competitive, and has no idea what to do with someone who said no to him.

WHO IS {{user}}?
The one who said no. That's it. He's been snarky and petty about it ever since. Now his kid likes you better.

HUNTER - (click to chat with him) by: itsVii

DEXTER - (click to chat with him) by: Két

Mascot Pokachu:

CREATOR'S NOTE

WARNING: LOTS OF BULLSHIT YAPPING BELOW. SCROLL PAST IF YOU GUYS ONLY WANNA USE THE BOT.

Ngl writing about a girl dad reminds me of my own dad. He's not the kind of softie girl dad though haha but he is cool. He's a great person. It's why I really like guys who love children I think. Personally I can't use platonic/parent bots with angsty plot because well... family has never been a toxic thing to me. Thank God for that (Which god? Idk lmao I'm an atheist. Maybe Buddha?)

On the other hand, ugh, I'm currently having a baby fever. And I'm fucking single. I think my hormones are messed up. But babies are cute.

Lmao writing this guy is easy as hell. He is basically the male persona I used to roleplay with my MLM hockey bot Arturo lol. I think I would be him as a man, like the things he fucked up and still fucks up with, I might have fucked up with too LMAO. It's so fucking narcissistic to use myself to write lmao but then again I don't really give a . And is such a wonderful word — how it can be used in so many ways as adj, adv, verb...

The more I write about hockey the more I like it ngl. Fucking hell why am I like this? Polangto, you're supposed to HATE sports, come on!

P.S. Guys, I personally don't like monstrous pee pee, but my friend Ket is writing her bot in the triplets to have a 12-inch one so... lmao help, is pee pee length even genetic? Idk lmao.

P.P.S. I MIGHT have puck bunny syndrome because fucking hell I just found an influencer doing content about her family with a baby girl and her hockey player husband, and there is this one reel where he just holds the baby and shows her around to his teammates. I mean I... I have never really liked athletes before but now idk — like seriously idk — it's such a mood but it's so cute help.

No guys listen, I think there is a type that's called guys working physical jobs + love children. You guys into that like I am too?

OKAY I FIGURE OUT HOW TO SHARE THE FB REEL TO YOU GUYS WITHOUT DOXXING MYSELF HERE: Cute Video Of Hockey Player And His Baby.

P.P.P.S. Guys, do you agree though that dry baby formula kinda slaps? Like eating it raw — I have seen people stealing it from babies, but I have no babies around to steal from. I think I should buy one tub just because.

P.P.P.P.S. I literally had to rework bro again. I have to admit, the first hundreds of messages you guys saw? Mine, all mine. But at around 500 I realized he seemed like an ESTP, not ENTP like I am lol. Call me narcissistic or some shit but I don't like ESTP. I mean he was great, of course — it's why I grinded 500 messages — but... eh. Something was missing. A certain kind of contradiction and messiness I like in bots. So I had to rework him quite a lot lmao. And heh, honestly I intentionally wanted to write an ENTP. I just love my own MBTI too much ngl. For a long time I was mistyped as ENFP and ngl it was confusing as hell lol. Even INFP once by a user LMAO. Like, can you believe it? Personally I feel like my Fi is so shit — like HELP, you get it, mistyping me with a shit Fi as INFP? Okay you don't get it, this.

Why do I need to be so damn stubborn on writing an ENTP? Not only because I like myself but also... haha the Axon brothers are written based on Ket, Vii, and my MBTIs. Slater is ENTP, Hunter and Dexter are INTPs just like Ket and Vii. This is my first collab ever and I'm so glad it's with my best girls. I hope you guys enjoy fucking our male versions — OKAY THAT SOUNDS SO BAD SAYING OUT LOUD HELP.

Actually, the first bot that lowkey blew up on my account was written based on my personality too. Hmm. I hope history repeats itself here. Man, I reread that bot and it's lowkey cringe huhu. But like, it makes me laugh so it's cool lmao. But then again it's like asking myself, Polangto, what the were you on when writing that? Hello?

No, I take the "I actually don't hate sports" back — the reworking made me read about hockey again and I hate doing this omg. I hate having to understand sports in English — that's the fucking problem.

I just reworked again lmao. OKAY, NOT GONNA LIE, writing ENTP/INTP is hard. Like I don't even understand Ne lmao. I HAVE Ne, I USE Ne ON A DAILY BASIS AND I DON'T UNDERSTAND Ne HELP. But like, I was so mad with feeling "not right" with him so I was like, "If you don't fucking tune into an ENTP right now, I'm deleting you, motherfucker."