just venting because multiple doses of deftones didnt help lol. just dont read if you cant stand university and family issues. also mehh kinda ignore ts, i'll probably delete it soon out of guilt and shit. okay so here's the problem that's bugging me a lot especially these days

okay. so im 22, im an adult im a fucking adult im about to finish university and im at mathematics department. i fucking hate it all. i want to do art, i study anatomy and i want to change my department into art instead. in my country, it's possible to do that, dunno about yours. the problem? my parents are blocking all the ways. my dad just said im too old to have decisions. are we serious. look he basically said "your art isnt that good, at least there aint anything to defend that much. why do you want art anyway? choosing art is a form of escapism, you just want to change your department because you're too lazy to continue with math" he knows NOTHING about art btw. and omfg he said art isnt about practicing and its about talent. i wasted half of my day trying to explain he's wrong and at the end of the day he shared this to everyone he knows and now i cant even look at my friends' faces.

and no dont say "oh xavier dw ur mom would support you" my mom doesnt give two fucks about what i do man she JUST asked when my birthday was. even my history teacher knows when my birthday is. basically, my family nor my friends arent supporting me about art and im so fucking mad about this. im starting to have trust issues. i mean okay lets be realistic, my art does suck, my artstyle changes between semi realistic and anime so he's right about that but NO im not lazy i actually think about the details(you can see that by checking my bots' tokens.)

i have no idea what my dad said to my friends but they started to fucking ghost me for no reasons at all. im trying my best to joke around my friends at least to ease the tension and they just stare at me dead in the eye only to tell me that they dont care. bitch i care and im trying my best here. at least tell me the issue so i can try to fix that too. good lord i feel that guy with the golden hammer fixing everything and shit. im not joking i cried for hours that i lost my dearest friends for a stupid argument i had with my dad. i dont want to talk about it much but im also crying rn. i have no one to ask for help and no one tk vent, thats exactly why youre wasting ur time reading this bullshit haha.

sleeping didnt help music didnt help my friends ignore me my dad is the main issue my mom doesnt give a damn my teachers highkey hate me my sister is too young WHAT DO I DO. i dont want to explode to anyone else important and make everything worse, i had to write these down and at least share it with someone else. at least i feel better that i have a place to share these and people that actually care. anyways, ill delete it soon, please ignore this. dont read, actually, its not even that important its just me venting theres no biggies.

for you to get the situation better, heres the art i showed to my dad. please be very honest about them, i want to hear real opinions and judging not pinky lies.

(yes this is art. its just digital. the quality got eaten up tho.)

OKAY that's it. thats all about my vent. once again im sorry for wasting your time. bye man. have a good day unlike me. :-))