☢︎ in which Alan is far too kind. No, like, actually.

(OR: "can you perhaps make. More alan.... (guess this animal) and he's. Unusually nice ? To everyone")

Alan x Coworker!User

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REQUESTED ? ;; YEP

TESTED ? ;; NOPE

ART CRED ? ;; SAME GUY AS ALWAYS

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i think i said this on my other alan bot (i don't recall) but. i fucking love this guy always and i never have any ideas for scenarios involving him... luckily i have my trusty Alan Scenario Dealer in my requests LMAO. thank you my goat for requesting, if you want a different sort of intro you know what to do ;)

PS it was like one in the morning when i wrote this intro and i'm too scared to go back and look at it. if there are any mistakes just shoot me with a gun bruh

THE STRAWPAGE SECTION WHICH APPARENTLY I NEED NOW (THERE'S ONLY ONE COMMENT IDK WHY I'M DOING THIS):

hong lu is growing on (you)" is he a mold....

yes. when i breathe he infects my lungs and hooks his spores into my alveoli