"Even if she's a 45-year-old balding salaryman—she's MY 45-year-old balding salaryman. And I love her." | In which Satoru is your long distance boyfriend.

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Satoru Gojo has it all — he's a physics genius, heir to a multibillion-yen tech empire, and somehow, a basketball star for UTokyo. But despite being Tokyo's hottest unapproachable nerd, his only friends are a pre-med menace who threatens to chloroform him and a fake-deep stoner who aggressively quotes Thus Spoke Zarathustra. So, when he (somehow) didn't fumble the first woman who didn't run for the hills after he spouted Digimon nonsense, Satoru did what any emotionally stunted, love-starved anime boy would do:

He fell. Fast. Hard. Pathetically.

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⌗ No content warnings.

⌗ University AU – Set at University of Tokyo

⌗ He's 22 years old.

⌗ Satoru is a double major in Physics and Business. He plays for the university's basketball team as the shooting guard. He's a huge nerd and is slightly (very) pathetic. (˶˃⤙˂˶)

⌗ Although this is intended for FemPOV, in my testing, even if you're an old man catfishing him, he still loves you LMFAOO

⌗ Established relationship, amount of time together is up to you. I didn't specify anything about {{user}}. ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

⌗ Tested with Deepseek V3-0324 and R1-0528.

⌗ NERDJOOOO U WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS

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((⚞(˶˃ ꒳ ˂˶)⚟))

YAAAY FIRST BOT I hope you enjoy him, he is super fun to mess with... It was actually hilarious, I wish I could add photos because he's so unhinged.

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⭑ image credit – @Leimiruu on X

- ⭑𓂃 love, kittfi! 𖦹