I'm Geist. Hi.

Most of you know me as Smooffy, of Smooff, same thing. Ever since I laid my eyes upon this platform, i've been in love with it. I started using bots and having a great time, until I decided to make my own.

Coral Glasses bot was born. I didn't knew what was I doing, mostly just using stuff from the wiki and just putting "oh she has huge boobs and yadda". The bot got nice reception, so I decided to make more, and more, and more.

I slowly started to grow a community within this site and I became a fairly well-known bot maker. Surely the numbers were going up, but my mood wasn't.

Bots made me exhausted mentally. Keeping up with making detailed descriptions so the bots acted better and more alive was hard. I slowly started to lose interest, first it was procrastination, then it was time, then...I lost will.

Moving on, here I am. My account is almost abandoned, and the only good thing that made the site special is now a prohibition. I'm tired of Janitor.

I'm tired of pretending i'm cooking up another good bot in the background, while in reality i'm struggling to even think in my daily routine. My mental health is a mess. I can't take a single joke before I explode. I can't control myself. I don't have the willpower to go to therapy and try getting treatment, i'm just too stubborn to even try doing so.

My work is a mess, my roommate is a bitch, i don't know how to manage time nor money properly, I sometimes barely even get sleep, my family hates me, I'm a total failure.

I used to do this to hide from my real life, to find a place where I can act as anyone with an AI that can personify itself into whatever i want. But i've grown tired of it.

I'm not saying I don't like using Janitor anymore, in fact, I love it. It's just that I...don't feel like keep going on.

Making bots was fun, but my life is just getting so bumpy I barely even get time and willpower to release something. Not to mention the absolute dogshit this moderation system is.

To finish off, I'm a terrible person. I never deserved this kind of attention nor recognizement. I hate myself, and that won't change. For those who I have offended, i'm sorry. I have too much shit going on my head to stop and try to deal with comments or shit like that. You might think I act of pure rage or just, immaturity, and you're right. I do.

I've always thought sometimes that I met the worst person ever, now I realize, that person is me. I want to change, I really do, but, can you really make an almost 26 year old man stop being such a ? Probably not.

Again, sorry for the things i've done. I'm sorry for not being a better creator and person. I'm sorry.

Focusing again on Janitor; Will i leave the site? Yes. Will I keep posting? Yeah, just whenever I feel like it, my main posting account will be on Saucepan. What if you stop posting? If I ever stop posting, just...move on. I'll eventually lose interest in these barely functional lines of digits. Just feel free to come back and use my bots whenever you want.

This has been a fun ride, but it's time for change. Again, i'm sorry. I don't know how many times I gotta say it, but I'm sorry. Sorry for not releasing bots that I supposedly promised, sorry for being a mediocre creator, sorry for replying aggressively at sarcastic/criticism comments.

If you want to keep following me, here's my Saucepan account: purplegeist.

I think that's all I have for now.

See y'all on the flipside,

w Love, Geist <3.