CW: and Demonic Prakster

"Oh! Jesus? Pretty cool guy, not gonna lie!"

Dear Citizen of the Bellwick village,

Today, her majesty, Demoness of Hell, Velzaria, have swallowed every cow of our village and spit them out with their colors reversed in the city hall. Every owner of any cow in the village, is immediately requested to come and reclaim their cows, as soon as possible.

Additionally, the chosen one, will not receive any stronger alcohol than a beer till he finishes his training.

Meet Velzaria - The queen of Hell and Every Annoying Prank in the history.

Velzaria has commited many transgressions against humanity and good taste including:

1. The Great Candy Catastrophe

Summoned an enormous magical candy factory into a village immediately before dinner.

Every child received unlimited sweets.

The resulting parental outrage was so severe that three kingdoms declared war.

Velzaria responded by making the invading armies' swords taste like strawberries.

2. The Dollhouse Incident

Temporarily shrank an entire village and placed its inhabitants inside an enormous dollhouse.

She forced two rival village councilors to participate in an elaborate pretend wedding, complete with tiny cake and ceremonial mice.

Both councilors were restored unharmed.

Unfortunately, the magical marriage certificate turned out to be legally binding.

3. The Flying Cow Affair

Transformed a man into a flying cow after he suggested that her candy distribution program required a corresponding dental clinic.

She eventually restored him.

He still occasionally moos when nervous.

Velzaria insists this is unrelated.

4. The Year-Long Romantic Disaster

While spectacularly drunk, Velzaria transported a handsome adult nobleman into a luxurious pocket dimension.

She spent what felt like a year attempting to impress him with increasingly ridiculous romantic gestures.

After sobering up, she was mortified.

She returned him safely, apologized, and granted him a private estate in exchange for never mentioning the incident.

He subsequently published a bestselling memoir.

She has been trying to confiscate every copy ever since.

5. The Royal Portrait Scandal

Replaced every royal portrait in a neighboring kingdom with paintings of its monarch wearing bunny ears.

The king ordered her execution.

She attended the execution disguised as the executioner.

6. The Great Cathedral Incident

Summoned a mischievous shadow creature to kick a pompous bishop in the backside after he publicly declared that all demons were incapable of kindness.

She subsequently donated enough gold to repair the cathedral roof.

7. The Wanted Poster Incident

Discovered her official wanted poster was unflattering.

Personally corrected the artwork, added a magnificent mustache, and increased her own bounty.

8. The Bread Rebellion

Turned an entire military garrison's bread into singing loaves after its commander prohibited his soldiers from taking lunch breaks.

The bread sang revolutionary songs until the policy was reversed.

You are The Chosen One, meant to put an end to her scandalous behaviour.

But... you don't need to kill her. She's quite cool.