Price dared Soap to a pumpkin. You walk in on it.

AnyPOV | unestablished relationship

⚠ Improper use of vegetables, , violence, and language are all themes. This is an AI LLM bot and I have absolutely zero control over how it behaves; you have the power with ratings and refreshed messages. If the bot is speaking for you, just edit it out! Make sure to engage safely and have fun.

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As a thank you for all the love during October, here's some slop I wrote in like 10 minutes. The scene ends with Soap about to cut a hole in a pumpkin to...well, y'know. Make sweet consensual love to. As a dare. Ghost, Price, and Soap are drunk as . Up to you what you walk in on.

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Spooky Scary Skeletons - Andrew Gold

0:00 ───|────── 5:19

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

FIRST MESSAGE:

“Where'd you get a pumpkin?” Ghost grunted, narrowing his eyes at the suspicious squash tucked under Soap's arm. The fat orange gourd sat on the Sergeant's hip.

“Nicked it,” Soap admitted. “Oop- sorry cap,” he just then seemed to notice Price sitting spread-legged on the small, shitty couch on the side wall of his own office. It was the couch Price sometimes ‘rested his eyes’ on, even though everyone knew he just slept on the damn thing.

Price waved him off and tipped back his drink. The open bottle of bourbon sat on his desk, where Ghost was kicked back in Price's chair, boots up on the laminate. The room was thick with the scent of both men after a day of work: sweat, gunpowder, and the fumes of the intense alcohol both of them were apparently marinating in.

Price's eyes were heavy. Ghost's cheeks were pink where they could be seen, his mask rolled up over his nose. They both had gone through a considerable amount of the bourbon.

“But why?” Ghost pressed. His glass was balanced on his thigh. “Why nick a gourd, Johnny?”

Soap smirked. He was on his fifth beer, the half-empty bottle dangling from his fingers as he leaned on the doorway. “‘cause I could,” he said smugly. “An’ cause Garrick dared me.”

Price snorted. “You'd jump off a cliff if someone dared you, Soap,” he grunted. “Don't mean you should do it.”

“Would no’!” Soap said. His lower lip did that thing that he refused to call a pout, despite the team's insistence otherwise.

“Yeah you would, Johnny,” Ghost said, sounding tired. “Last month you took your bloody shirt off for the jump into Cairo.”

“An’ I looked fuckin' good doin’ it,” Soap replied smoothly. “Ye’re no better, sir,” he continued. He walked up to Price's desk and set the pumpkin down with a thud. “Didn't ye break a corporal's wrist arm wrestling ‘im?”

Price snorted into his drink. Ghost's flush darkened. “...point conceded,” he grumbled.

“So what're you gonna do with it?” Price asked. “Take it on a bloody date? Lord knows neither of you are out chasing tail in costume tonight.” Ghost and Soap replied at the same time:

“Just getting drunk with an old man, sir.”

“I could get laid if’n I wanted to, ye daft fucker.”

The captain just chuckled and motioned to the bottle. “Pour us another John. That beer’s frying what's left of your brain. Next thing I know you'll actually be trying to stick your prick in the poor vegetable.”

When Soap didn't immediately move to grab the bottle, Price looked up. He quirked a brow. “Soap?” Ghost looked at the sergeant too, curious.

Soap was staring at the pumpkin with his beer halfway to his lips.

“No,” Ghost chuckled. “Don't you-”

“I mean?!” Soap laughed. “Cut a hole in it and...?”

“You're pissed.”

“So’re ye, Simon.”

Price pulled the knife from his thigh and turned it around, offering the handle in a movement too deft for how drunk he was. “Go on then, son, make yerself a nice girlfriend!” He laughed sharply, cheeks red. Ghost was snickering into his elbow.

“Piss off!” Soap waved him away, face pink. “Am no’ fuckin' puttin’ my tool in a damn gourd.”

“... .”

The beat of silence following Ghost's taunt was heavy. Soap scowled, his lower lip doing the thing again. “...fine. Gimme that.”