ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ ᴅɪᴇ

Hiya first of all thanks for reading this shitty vent I just need to get a few things off my mind I wouldn't be saying anything names but yes.

All my life I've always been kind stupidly kind as my friend described it as, I choose to step up and help not even knowing if the other people would even do the same for me

I've feed the strays, I've given to the homeless when I had nothing myself, I don't expect anything from it.

Anyways.

I'm currently out of a proxy and whatever bot I make results in a failure or just doesn't meet my standards.

Getting straight to the point when I had an abundance of paid proxy I could have kept it all for myself I never did that I shared it with my fellow creator's and "friends" as I quote.

Did that for months until I eventually ran out and stayed proxy less for weeks to month's maybe

Until around 2-3 months back a fellow creator (creator 1) who I shared my stuff with in the past.

Came to me offering a proxy of their own I agreed thinking it was going to be chill now that I'll have a proxy again.

It was quite alright for awhile until like yesterday this creator asked me about if I want a separate proxy I was hesitant and rightfully so I didn't wanted the person to waste their hard earned money over another proxy that I wouldn't even use to the full potential no?

So I rejected the idea and told them it would be best if we just shared one since neither would use the entire 60 million token limit because they were trying a new site that supported tokens instead of requests I'm pretty sure they just did it for the glm 5.7 model that's not available everywhere well fast forward to yesterday "night" this creator meets another one of out creator friend for simplicity sake we'll call this friend

Creator 2

Well creator 2 has a proxy but it's a bad one so creator 1 suggested that if creator 2 wants a separate proxy that creator 1 could buy for them

I was just watching from the sidelines for awhile until I got up and messaged creator 1 that instead of buying a separate proxy we could just share the one we're already using no? It sounded good nothing wrong with my assumptions

Since me myself and I shared to like 4 people Lol before I ran out myself.

Now you'd think the creator 1 would just reply reasonable but instead they reply with to me as shown as in the picture below I've censored them to keep their privacy I don't want anyone harassing anyone.

You see creator 1 is getting upset but not explaining their reasoning for it.

Then the next text basically just shocked me because I wasn't expecting hostility

As you can see I'm not hiding anything but their identities for their own privacy I repeat this is just for my own personal opinions not meant to spread hate or anything towards the others.

I ended up pretty upset over this comment of theirs because all my past efforts got undermined in a single reply as if they never meant something.

So I just told them it would be best if I just gave my key to creator 2 that way they'll be happy and I'll just go back to the janitor LLM even though I didn't wanted to but sensing the hostility couldn't help myself but ask just how many dead plants have I been watering.

ft Abuse mention below

My mental health is really unstable at the moment as it gets progressively worse, you see I've been getting verbally abused for the past 3-4 year's I wouldn't be going into details about my personal life but that does have some hand on my slow uploads I'm active but my mind is just out of the spark.

I've been getting called useless for nearly all my life

Online and offline it has caused me to be have a small temper that if someone tries to show me attitude or try to act like they're better than me I go into a semi stage where I may do thing's that I wouldn't normally do such as me back talking to the first creator 1

Even though I didn't wanted to but I wasn't willing to let it go either I'm a nice guy but even I'm human at the end man I can have emotionally outburst that may not show fully but they do happen

I'll be ending it here folks

It took me awhile to write and I would be pretty surprised if you'd actually take your time to read it all

One thing that I would like to mention that don't ignore your mental health it is important and know that you matter just as anyone else in the world

Seek help or guidance from a trusted figure in your life if you're feeling that is wrong. That's it

Cya