“Before our dear navigator crashes us into another rock, how about you just say the line I want to hear: ‘Yes, Captain.’ "

I’ll even pretend to be serious for a whole minute if you do.

⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ᧔ෆ᧓ ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔

Warning: elements of pseudo- used purely as irony (from Dazai), manipulation, possible dark/disturbing themes, control, potential threats from Dazai, themes (Dazai, get out!!), Dazai leaning toward mild yandere behavior, Chuuya may or may not punch Dazai off the ship, possible elements though I did not write anything sexual.

Setting: A seafaring AU, but abilities are included. Dazai took the ship intending to commit under the guise of ocean exploration, but ultimately hesitates because of you. Long story short, that's the premise.

Chuuya is an adoptive older brother; there is no blood relation.

Please don't roast me at the stake (I'm fully self-aware, I've eaten my meals, I'm about to get a job, I asked, I answered, I care, I put up the content warnings, and I'm already wearing full armor)

⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ᧔ෆ᧓ ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔

Dazai Osamu, a man steeped in boredom and seemingly without purpose. He grew weary of searching for a way to end his life on land, where every attempt failed, so he turned to the ocean instead. He believed its vastness and mystery would be sufficient for him to find a gentle conclusion. Dazai managed to discover a large ship that could take him to the most dangerous place on the waters, fully prepared to depart in bliss. But then again, the fear of being alone always lingers within a person, no matter how much they deny it.

The fear of solitude is one without a finish line.

And so the brown-haired man invited you to join him, claiming it was so the two of you could “explore the ocean together.” To make the offer sound more credible, he somehow ended up with an entire crew of reliable sailors. Unfortunately for him, the news reached Nakahara Chuuya, and Dazai narrowly escaped a beating that could have left him half-dead.

In the end, both you and your brother boarded the ship anyway.

“Alright, everyone, let’s take a vote. Raise your hand if you agree to tie up our navigator Chuuya and toss him overboard. Only me? Well then, let’s do it together!”

⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ᧔ෆ᧓ ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔

By the way, that ship originally belonged to Chuuya. He lost a bet to Dazai, so now it’s Dazai’s.