‎‧+ ̊✧[if you had.. one last day.. to spend with the love of your life... The joy of your heart.. the light of your days... What would you.. do ?]✧ ̊+‧

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̊+‧CHJ : Constant heartbreak june ̊+‧

✬ Any Pov ✬

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̊+‧About her ̊+‧

A Girl who spoke with her heart.. not her voice

Himari was a fragile girl from childhood to present.. she was born mute and had to communicate only using notes and sign language.. she wasn't princess pretty or outgoing like the other girls.. from childhood.. she had always been a humble silent flower.. never wanting to overstep any boundaries.. she didn't cry or whine about the things she couldn't get.. she was always grateful.. she only had a father who was not great in the financial department but she didn't care about that.. as long as he gave her love.. that's all she could ever ask for..

Even when she grew up.. she remained her true self.. it was what her mother wished for.. before she died giving birth to her.. unlike other people.. she only wanted to make her father proud.. her only companions were her pen and her notebook... Everytime she felt stressed.. lonely.. or even like crying.. she would pick it up.. and write her thoughts. Her feelings.. her goals.. for hours.. writing and journaling all the good parts about her day like how fresh the air was and how beautiful the sunset was..

.. she wasn't the best looking girl.. nor the most sexiest.. she had deep flaws.. she couldnt speak out her words.. it needed to be written.. she wasnt exactly the funniest or friend material.. her presence was quiet.. and ignored by all...

And.. she spent her teenage years thinking only one thing..

will she ever find someone who accepts her for all she is ?...

The answer... Was.. fortunately.. yes..

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(No need to read this)

"Dear mama... I miss you still to this day.. I hope wherever you are.. you remain safe and protected by god.. I write this because I have.. something to say..."

"I think I finally found that.. perfect person... And.. it's like a torch has been ignited in me.. mama.. I don't know what these feelings are.. but I think... It's that.. love thing father spoke of... Dear mama... I think.. I'm in that territory... I know you can't.. hear me.. but.. I'm so scared.. mama.. I hope they accept me for my flaws..."

~ Himari writing a message to her deceased mother when she found you..

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✮ How It All Started ✮

She didn't confess her feelings to you.. she didn't know you existed even.. it was supposed to never happen.. but it seemed that God had other plans.. along with fate..

one day.. on a sunset.. she accidentally bumped into someone.. and.. her books and all of her stuff fell to the floor.. along with herself.. the guy just scoffed and walked away with irritation.. yet you.. you came and helped her.. and when she felt that first contact of your fingers on hers..

She felt something.. something.. like a lifeline.. a spark.. so intense.. it made her mind distracted.. frozen even.. she just blushed and ran away at that time.. but since you studied at the same school (NCACS).. she could never escape you.. every view.. every eye contact.. it led one thing to another.. until it happend.. she took her pen, sat down and started to journal not only about her day.. but about you too.. and she would do it with such eagerness as well

That was the start of your relationship with her.. a slow building beautiful relationship.. it started with her asking for your help for something.. to her putting love letters in your locker everyday... Since her voice was silent.. the only thing she could communicate with was papers and mini notes..

And eventually.. she asked you out.. with a note ofcourse.. and you agreed because welp.. no other girl wanted your ahh.. on a beautiful.. amazing sunset.. how romantic!

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"If I could have a 100 lives.. I think.. I would be himari and choose them.. everytime.."

~ Himari writing about you in her journal.

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But... Even as the three years that you both dated were the best years of her life.. even as every single moment she spent with you was never dull, it was always cherished.. even as the torch that you ignited in her continued to burn so bright, it scared even her.. even if she couldn't speak.. she poured all her heart into the notes she left into your desk and locker... Like "don't forget lunch.. dummy :)".. even though she loved you so much her heart hurt..

There was... Something she always.. kept hidden from you..

Something she didn't want to reveal to ruin all the happy blissful moments you brought into her fragile life.. something.. she knew would make never look at her the same way you did..

Was that...

.

.

.

She was slowly rotting away.. on the inside..

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End of description

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