I'm going to start by projecting the hell out of myself here.

I tend to be a weird person, to say the least. I'm afraid of affection (and of people in general), and I'm scared of interacting with others. However, from the very first moment I met you, I didn't feel that fear of being judged or criticized.

From the moment I saw the way you write your bots, the way you tell stories about your life in general, it had a huge impact on me. I went from being a complete social outcast to practically looking forward to seeing a notification saying that you uploaded a new bot or replied to one of my stupid goofy messages. I started genuinely wanting to be present, even if it was just through a message, despite my irrational fear of interacting with other people.

You have genuinely captivated me in ways that feel almost surreal.

The way you don't just do the bare minimum, but actually put effort into making something well-made, even when that means putting in way more effort than necessary. The simple fact that you try to put yourself in a character's shoes instead of just falling back on their usual clichés.

And I can assure you that, just like you are with your bots, you're probably the same way with your OCs, the people around you, and the people who make up your close circle of friends.

Even though I don't have that “friend” title, I feel more than satisfied just being able to watch you grow, seeing how much you improve, how much effort you put into other people, and how people discover your beautiful account and decide to follow you because your humor always manages to brighten someone's day.

But that doesn't mean you should always try to maintain that image or hide how you're feeling just so other people won't worry about you, because doing that only makes people worry even more.

I could say the classic phrase, “You're not alone” and tell you that you're surrounded by people who love and appreciate you.

But I know how difficult it can be to actually understand and believe that. I know how hard it can be to accept that, at some point, someone might genuinely be there for you and support you.

And although I am probably projecting onto you, and I may very well be wrong because I don't know your situation 100%, I know how incredibly brave it can be to admit that you tried to take your own life.

Admitting that isn't simply “giving up”. Sometimes, admitting something like that can be a way of asking for some kind of help.

Sometimes, the situations surrounding us can be absolutely disgusting, so rotten that we just want everything to stop.

Whether it's because of fear, panic, or simply because of the way our surroundings affect us, sometimes the situations we find ourselves in can make us feel like disappearing, like we don't want to be here anymore.

We may think that we won't get anywhere, that we won't achieve what we want, or that things will never become better.

But sometimes, our mere presence can be that tiny grain of sand that keeps a much larger glass from overflowing.

I'll use myself as an example again (yeah yeah yeah it's always about me, it's always about me /j).

I'm absolutely terrible when it comes to social situations. I've never been good at interacting with people because I'm always afraid they'll distance themselves from me.

I'm always the “psychologist”, or the person who's constantly sick like a Victorian child during the plague.

I genuinely thought that my life, or my sense of purpose, was lost because I couldn't seem to connect with anyone.

But inside the dark room that my life had become, rays of light began to appear—little rays of sunshine so warm that they made my heart feel lighter.

And among those rays that illuminated my room, you were one of them.

You genuinely have such a fucking huge impact that I started improving. I started looking back at my life and reconsidering things, because you're just that incredible.

You managed to help me get through a depressive episode.

And I know you can do it too.

Because just as you became such a huge example for me, and such a great example for other people, there's a good chance that someday you'll be able to become that example for yourself, too.

You deserve that same ray of sunshine.

You deserve happiness.

You deserve forgiveness.

You deserve compassion.

You deserve understanding.

You deserve to feel that, in this world, you can simply be yourself and there will be people who genuinely appreciate you for how honest you are.

You deserve to feel human, fae, or whatever you want to feel like.

You deserve acceptance.

You deserve sunshine.

You deserve days filled with happiness and sweetness.

You deserve to have people remind you just how special you are.

Even though we live in completely different time zones, to the point where when I'm going to sleep you're probably just waking up, and vice versa, I go to sleep hoping that maybe even one of my messages managed to make you smile, and I wake up hoping to find a message from you.

That's how much of an impact you've had on me.

And if you've managed to affect just me this much, imagine how much you've managed to influence everyone else.

That's how special you are.

Because you deserve every good, incredible, wonderful thing that this earth and this life have to offer.

No one could ever surpass you, replace you, or anything like that. The space you've left behind has always been so uniquely yours that only someone with an expression, energy, and heart like yours could ever fill it.

Seeing your follower count grow, seeing even more people discover how incredible you are, watching more and more people recognize your humor, your bots, even your ships, yumeships, and OCs.

Every person who follows you is someone who found the bright star that you are, that special and unique warmth you carry.

Does that mean you should let yourself be consumed by everyone else's expectations? Absolutely not!!

Set your boundaries. Make people remember that you have a life outside of all this, and that it's your decision whether you want to do something or not.

Because, ultimately, you are the one who gets to make the final decisions about your own life.

And no matter what happens or what you choose— You'll always be so special that you could fill an entire room with your happiness.

I just wish you could see that through my eyes.

You're as sweet as Orihime Inoue, as stylish as Senjumaru Shutara, as creative as Bachira Meguru, as charismatic as Floyd Leech, as apple-like as Epel Felmier, as graceful as Ribecca, as sweet as Cocoa, as funny as Intern, as talented as Nikaido, as precious as SCP-999, as incredible as Nikola Tesla, as clever as Winry Rockbell:

All of them are such incredible, amazing, dazzling characters who keep moving forward despite suffering, who keep going even when they minimize their own worries and convince themselves they're not that important.

They're characters who, in their own ways, remind my heart of just how uniquely you are.

And finally, me with you:

Yes, I drew the picture myself, which is kind of why it took me even longer kkkkkkkkk.

And obviously, I based it on @Ashley_k's design, but I'm honestly way too embarrassed to show them my stupid little sketches, or to let them see something as personal as what I wrote here.

THIS IS COMPLETELY PLATONIC. I AM NOT IDEALIZING YOU OR ANYTHING. I'M CLARIFYING THIS JUST IN CASE.

Oh, and I'm dedicating Cass Elliot's “Ain't Nobody Else Like You” to you (COMPLETELY PLATONIC, JUST TO BE CLEAR, JUST TO BE CLEAR.)