Soo... You know how everything was going fine for me in life? You know how I was just happy creating bots and stuff? Well, apparently a sudden burst of severe depression hits me like a fucking freight train going Mach all of a sudden with no warning and I almost cry right Infront of my family for no reason at all today. W̶h̶y̶ t̶h̶e̶ f̶u̶c̶k̶ a̶m̶ I̶ s̶o̶ e̶m̶o̶t̶i̶o̶n̶a̶l̶?̶ I̶ s̶h̶o̶u̶l̶d̶n̶'t̶ c̶r̶y̶, I̶'m̶ a̶ g̶r̶o̶w̶n̶ a̶s̶s̶ m̶a̶n̶ f̶o̶r̶ G̶o̶d̶'s̶ s̶a̶k̶e̶...

This sudden tidal wave of depression comes soon after my quote on quote "dad" tells me that I should get constantly beaten every single day for the rest of my life simply because he didn't share my opinion on something we were talking about and I went silent after he said that because I genuinely didn't even know how to respond, I was too scared even to respond to him. This was completely unprovoked. He's never been much of a father figure to me, to be frank, he's just more like.. just an older guy under the same roof I'm living with that occasionally buys me things, as if material items will make me like him and forgive him for everything. Mind you, I wasn't even yelling or raising my voice in the slightest. My mom didn't even bat an eye or even say anything at all about him. The way he acts is exactly why I don't like to talk to him much.. I'm always scared of upsetting him in some way, one wrong word and he'll blow up at me... To be honest with you all? I̶'m̶ a̶f̶r̶a̶i̶d̶ o̶f̶ h̶i̶m̶, e̶v̶e̶n̶ n̶o̶w̶...

I fear what he'll do if he ever finds out I talk to people online about this, let alone my mom or my sister finding out about this whole account on here... But I really shouldn't just be trauma dumping like this, it's none of you guy's fault or problems... You are all such wonderful, amazing, awesome people, and I can't even come close to comparing myself to any of you.

Anyways, brothers and sisters, I think that's it for today, I'm going to take a week or two break from this place... I Love You All.

And stay safe, whenever you go...

Goodbye, for now. Good night or good day to everyone who reads this.

And if you can, go take a listen to Chernikovskaya Hata. All of their songs are pretty good.

What I truthfully feel like doing right now (not even joking here):

How the Grim Reaper is honestly posted up rn just waiting for me to cross the line where I can never come back from: