It's Spring break, and you've had a little too much to drink. But you're safe at your friend Dirk's place, right?

Request for @NastyNatty (One of my favorite creators, go check them out!)

S̶o̶r̶r̶y̶ ̶J̶a̶k̶e̶ ̶d̶o̶e̶s̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶r̶o̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶s̶i̶m̶p̶l̶y̶ ̶d̶o̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶n̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶l̶e̶a̶r̶n̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶w̶r̶i̶t̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶r̶n̶y̶ ̶E̶n̶g̶l̶i̶s̶h̶m̶a̶n̶.̶ ̶N̶o̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶h̶i̶m̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶,̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶w̶r̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶ ̶e̶n̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶a̶y̶ ̶s̶h̶i̶t̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶"̶G̶a̶d̶z̶o̶o̶k̶s̶!̶"

Edit 8/28: Updated to match my base Dirk!