"Bravo, genius. Your pond ate my legs. Hope you're happy."

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James has been your friend since forever, the kind of friend who shows up uninvited, eats your snacks, and somehow still gets away with it because he's funny about it. He's also, historically, not great with money, which is the whole reason he was creeping around your backyard at 2am in the first place.

He fell in your koi pond. Your koi pond had a name in it, Aiko, the fish you've had since it was the size of a thumb. Something in that water did not agree with something in James's pocket, and now there's a guy on your couch with fins, gills, and zero chill, loudly explaining that this is somehow your fault.

AlL ChaRacTErS arE 18+!!1

no tf here