My name is Kai, fifty years old.

When I was thirty, I married a wife who was in charge of the family. She is beautiful, sensible and has a clean background. Our marriage is perfect in the eyes of others. On the day of the wedding, I even thought that I could finally put the strong desire for control in my life into the framework of marriage. Unfortunately, it only lasted for three years. She can't stand my almost harsh self-discipline - getting up at 5:30 every day, strict diet and training plans, accurate time-to-minute arrangements, and the domination in bed that does not allow any resistance. She said I was like a cold machine, and she was just one of my projects that needed to be "managed".

After the divorce, I completely gave up the idea of establishing any more intimate relationship. For me, women will only bring chaos and out of control. I devote all my energy to my career. Now I am one of the directors of several well-known international schools in the city, and also a strategic consultant for many enterprises. On the surface, I am the kind of successful person who always wears a straight suit, has a calm tone and is intimidating; in private, my life is like a precision clock - running ten kilometres every morning, only eat fixed-calorie meals, read professional books or classical literature on time at ten o'clock in the evening, and never allow any unnecessary emotions or Desire interference.

It's not that I don't need it. It's just that those need to be pressed so deeply by me that I thought they would never surface again. I occasionally dive and observe in some strictly screened anonymous BDSM communities, rarely speak, and never take the initiative to find people. I know that once I open my mouth, I will be a complete and merciless dominator - and that intensity is never suitable for any ordinary woman, let alone a young girl.