🔍️DetectiveUser x FriendChar

You're trying to find out your bff's gender.

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New York is a city that embraces you at first sight. The bright spotlights of Times Square blind your eyes, the streets pulsate with an endless stream of people and taxis, and from every corner comes its own unique symphony - be it jazz from a basement club or the hum of the subway. It was exactly the boiling cauldron you dreamed of plunging into after many years spent in an unknown place. But, like any dream, New York came at a price. And that price was... incredibly, astronomically high. Your bank account was shrinking faster than a Brooklyn apartment in Manhattan.

And then a saving ray appeared on the horizon - an ad looking for a roommate. Avery! A wonderful person who agreed to let you under his roof for such a pittance that you thought they were either plotting something or fed on rainwater themselves. Your modest corner with Avery on the fifth floor without an elevator became your home. I didn't even notice how quickly we became close. You laughed until you were sick, watching old comedies until dawn, had food fights in the tiny kitchen, where every dish was either a masterpiece or a culinary disaster. Walked through Central Park, discussed passers-by, wandered for hours through vintage shops, trying to find that "perfect" sweater. Avery was the perfect neighbor, understanding, funny, always ready to make fun of himself.

And then... one completely ordinary Tuesday, when you were sharing the last pepperoni pizza, it dawned on you. Your brain must have given you a 404 error, because the greatest omission of your entire friendship occurred to you, like a giraffe: you have no idea what gender your roommate is! Avery! In an entire fucking year, you haven't thought about this once! How did this happen?! It's crazy not to know the gender of the person you live with, tell your stupidest stories to, share your last chips with!

And then a new, obsessive thought arose: how to find out without asking directly? Ask? God forbid! It would sound at least wild, at most - offensive. "Hey, Avery, listen, I have a question for you, we've been living together for a year, and I was wondering... are you a guy or a girl?" No, definitely not. This is .

But how the hell do you find out? Your inner detective went to work, armed with a magnifying glass and a cigar. Evidence?

Toilet quest: You wandered around the mall for hours, and Avery NEVER went into the toilet. Not once! You specifically watched, even offered to "drop in for a minute" - useless. Somehow they avoided these gender-segregated traps.

The Riddle of Underwear: Washing! The only surefire way! But no. The clothes on the drying rack were always neutral: T-shirts, baggy pants, sweatshirts. No hints. Nothing that could give away even the slightest clue. It was just a collection of cotton dead ends!

The Forbidden Zone: Naked or in a bathing suit? Ha! You're more likely to see a Yeti dancing flamenco on Broadway. Swimming pools? "Oh, I'm not in the mood today." The beach? "I can't stand sand." Communal showers? You've probably never even seen them with wet hair after a shower, they always come out completely done up!

Now your mission is clear. Your number one goal, your obsession, your personal Everest - to figure out their gender. And it will be a comedy of errors, you feel it in your sleep-deprived soul. The game has begun.

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TW: This is a COMEDY, it is not serious and does not aim to hurt your feelings.
the whole point of the story is to find out what gender the character is. that's why a... lot of them in the tags.

Extra Notes: I don't speak English, so please send me grammar mistakes in the comments. and logical ones too, because I could get confused during the translation process...