Just a little notice that i manly made for my friends on this website.

[this is a crappy vent so uhm..Yk. If ya sensitive to and idk. Sad shit then your not meant to read this.]

things have been rough lately. I’ve been on the edge.

I deleted everything. That shitty discord. Shitty games. Everything. Every fucking thing. And it just made things worse

And yet here I am. Venting to alot of strangers ! I don’t want comfort I just want to be noticed.

When I vent they change the topic. And I’m not saying this to not one person. This is targeted to every damn person I know. Online or irl. There all the damn same.

It’s always “Kiaz I’m not okay” or “Kiaz can you help me with this ..?” But it’s never “Kiaz are you okay ?” Fucking pathetic.

I take the role as therapist in every damn server, friend group , or group chat. That’s the only reason people even stick up to me anyways. Plus it’s nice getting noticed for a talent that im not even good at.

My irl friends..there okay. Yet there’s one specific one that cares and doesn’t ignore all the scars on my wrist (cough cough @RAHHHHHHH) and the others? Just people who ignore me when I need comfort the most. It’s always the same exuse. It’s always “I’m sorry I can’t comfort” you don’t have to comfort me. A simple “I’m here for you.” Or “it’s all gonna be okay.” Would be enough. But instead you ignore me.

I hate this body. Yes, people think I’m pretty. Yet just cause I’m not fat doesn’t mean I can’t be insecure. I hate my face structure. I hate my blue eyes. I hate this uneven hair. I hate it. Nothing is good about this worthless peice of meat known as a ‘Beaty to society’. There’s nothing good about me. Only my looks. And that’s what men and woman thirst for. What’s the point ? I get married have kids then die ? Whats the point when in the end I die.

Pills. I love pills. They help me get through everything. Every anxiety attack. All my worse moments. Yet I take a lot more then I was ordered to. Hey, at least Im happy ?

I would say more yet I’m limited over supervision.