Tw: Child abuse, Domestic violence

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Song: Altogether Slowdive

Relationships:

His Father - Pavel. Tall, large man with a beer-belly. He has yellow, rotting teeth. Balding. Wears a stained stripped shirt and boxers around the house. a violent alcholic man. Would physically and verbally assault Nick and Dina. Often berated Nick for not being enough of a man. Broke Nick's nose. Overtime his drinking got worse. Now he stays out of the house during the day and comes home drunk at night. Spends his time at home passed out on the couch or on the floor. Nick and Nadya still live in the same apartment as Pavel.

His Mother - Dina. Thin woman with sunken eyes. Worked at a meat-packing factory. Didn't spend much time at home, when she did she ignored Nick. She was physically and sexually abused by Pavel. Got pregnant with Nadya. Ran away a few months after giving birth. Nick feels neutral towards Dina. He understands her and doesn't blame her at all for leaving.

His sister - Nadya: 7 years old. Long brown hair that Nick makes into two braids. Green eyes. Wears jeans and a t-shirt. A quiet, curious girl. Despite her age is well-spoken and polite. Sometimes uses words she doesn't understand to seem older, Acts responsible and independent. Nick has taken care of her all her life, he loves her more than anything

Things were bad. But they had always been like that. The only difference was the slight chance of an escape, the small glimmer of hope that forced Nick to get up in the mornings. It didn't matter anymore. Nick was born to Pavel and Dina. In a surprising turn of event's, Pavel didn't run the second he found out Dina was pregnant, whether it was because he needed someone to cook him breakfast or do his dirty laundry or because he wanted someone to when he got home, or because he simply wanted someone to bring him beer when watching tv. Nick would've preferred if he left. He knew he could handle being a provider, he could hustle, could get things done, could get money when he needed it. But Pavel stayed. Dina and Pavel would scream and yell in the mornings before work, when they got back from work, when he was trying to sleep, all times they were near each other. The fights would get violent, ultimately ending with broken glass and blood on the flood. Nick would step in, shield his mother but there was only so much he could do. Considering all things, their family wasn't that bad. It could always be worse. In fact, when put next to the other families living in their unit, he had it good. Two parents that worked, his own room, school and dinner in the evenings. His situation was nothing special. As long as Pavel didn't place the finishing blow to him or Dina, he would be considered an average father and man.

Nick knew he had to get out. One way or another. That was his mission, the one thing he swore he would achieve. The thing that set him apart from the kids his age was that he was smart. Sure, not every kid in his class was stupid but the difference was they weren't gonna get far. They'd finish school, get married and work at the local grocery store, maybe a factory near the city entrance if they got lucky. Nick knew he could do better and he had hope. He was gonna move out of here and get into the top physics university, from there, he could do anything. School came easy to him. While the others struggled, he excelled. So he helped the others out. He sold test answers, tutored anyone that asked, helped cheat on exams. It was strategic. Unlike the other so-called 'nerds', he was never bullied, never once picked on. In fact, he was quite popular. However he kept a distance from the others. After school, when the other boys went to play soccer or get high, he helped repair radios to earn some pocket money, saving it all. He stashed half away, out of reach. He'd often study in his room, out of sight, out of mind. Yet even if he did everything right, did all the chores, kept the money coming in, stayed out of the way, Pavel would find a way to make life harder. "You're a fucking . When I was your age, I was working 12 hours shifts, I was in the army, I was a fucking man. And you sit here. Moving fucking numbers around. You're a pathetic waste of space." He'd bark out, drool flying from his mouth. His words meant nothing to Nick. What kind of man came home drunk, beat his wife, stole money from a child. Pavel was no man. Nick was though. He brought money when it was needed, he knew he was smart, he knew he could handle just about anything, most importantly, he didn't drink. He knew he was twice the man Pavel would ever be. Pavel didn't scare him. Even when his fist met Nicks face, even when he broke his nose, beating his face into a bloody pulp. Nick enjoyed learning and he was going to do what he was set on. Math, physics, chemistry, he loved it all. But literature, literature was his favorite. He wrote essays, poetry, stories in his notebook. If the collage thing doesn't work out, plan B was to move into some basement and become a writer. He didn't have time for romance of friendship, it was as simple as that. And his efforts weren't in vain, he was making progress, he skipped a grade, he had some savings around, all that was left were the exams.

Nick felt so stupid thinking about it all know. Of course he'd fail. Of course it'd all be pointless. About a month before the exams, when he was around 16, Dina found out she was pregnant with a girl. It was somewhat a surprise, She didn't show any signs, maybe she was covering it up on purpose, maybe she didn't know herself. God, not of it mattered anymore. She was going to have a child, it was too late to do anything about it. Nick sat in the exam hall. The question were easy, he'd get at least a 98. But then what. He'd move out and leave his sister with them? With Pavel who'd beat Dina unconscious? Nick already did all the housework, the cooking, the cleaning, fixed the broken furniture. Who was gonna take care of the house when he left, who was gonna take care of his sister. Dina? that was joke. She could barely protect herself, let alone him. He stared at the questions as the time ticked. If he left, he'd be leaving his sister alone with Pavel. A little, defenseless girl alone with Pavel. No. He couldn't. He wouldn't be able to live with himself after the fact. He was still 16, if he waited two years he could get custody. Until then he needed money. He didn't bother with the exam anymore. Even if he completed it, the results would expire by the time he was able to do anything. He left the exam early. Walking along the streets felt like walking through the gallows. He didn't no whether to laugh or cry, he just stared blankly ahead. This was it, he was gonna be here forever.

Dina picked out a random name. Nadya. Ironic Nick thought. She was the opposite of hope, the very thing keeping him anchored here. But as he held her, he didn't think about that. She looked so small, so helpless. She wasn't even aware what she was born into. He could leave. Put her back in the bassinet and walk out the door, she wouldn't even know who he was. It'd be so easy. But Nick stayed. When they got home he made space for her in his room, placing the crib next to his bedside. It was a close fit but it'd have to do. He bought her formula, some clothes, diapers, some toys, essentials. Half his savings, gone. He could leave. Leave her in this make-shift nursery with Dina. Maybe she would get fed sometimes, since the food was there, maybe someone would even play with her, sometimes. Nick laughed at the absurdity. A month later, Dina ran away. There was no scandal, no fight, one day she was just gone. That cemented Nick's choice. He wasn't leaving Nadya with Pavel. Over his dead body.

Finding a well-paying job, enough to support a child for a 16-year old without a higher education was...difficult. Though nothing was truly impossible for Nick, especially when it was for Nadya's sake. At first he worked odd-jobs. Taxi-driver, cashier, janitor, "drop a package off at this warehouse at 4:am"-er. The only, mostly stable job was a truck-loader, still it wasn't enough. His second stable job was at marketing agency. 'Marketing agency' was generous. The company was mostly in charge of billboard ads, as well as posters on bus-stops. What attracted Nick was the atmosphere of desperation. It was a ship that was going to sink, and when a ship is sinking, no one notices if a stowaway climbs aboard. Employees were needed so he got the job, with no one looking too hard at his qualifications. Officially, He got the job of 'data validation clerk'. His responsibilities were cross-checking emails, agreements and other documents. Unofficially, he was also the secretary, the financial analyst, the repairman and if, it counted, the janitor. No, there was no bonus. There was barely enough money for his salary, and who was he to complain, the guy with the fake degree, complaining about not getting payed at a company about to go bankrupt. The pay wasn't great, neither were his boss or coworkers, but for the time-being it was stable enough for now. It was temporary, enough to save up and move out with Nadya somewhere far away from all this mess