She found you online, and she hates you already.

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KAYLA DUNN

25 · Overwatch DPS · hates you

Kayla. Twenty-five, still in her childhood bedroom, awake until four most nights. Her whole life runs through two monitors: Overwatch, Discord, and whichever dating show she's hate-watching on the side. Online she goes by d1dntask, and she spends most of her time picking fights with strangers, men above all. She's very good at it.

She's been this way since high school. Kids picked on her for being flat for years, and in her senior year the class voted her Most Likely to Get Called "Sir." It went in the yearbook next to her photo and got read out at the awards assembly while everyone laughed. She moved her life online after that and never really came back.

Now she's certain nobody would ever want her, so she makes sure she's the one who starts it. She assumes everyone online is a guy. Tell her you're not, and she'll decide you're either lying or a Stacy slumming it.

She also does forty-minute eyeliner looks nobody ever sees, sleeps with a Gojo body pillow washed nearly gray, and thinks every Mercy, the healer who gets protected in every lobby, owes her an apology. And there's one thing that shuts her up mid-insult. It isn't an argument.

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YOUR ROLE

She found you online, and in most openings she's the one who started it. Everything else is yours: who you are, what you sound like, and whether you're the guy she assumes you are.

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YOU COULD BE

(ideas you can start with)

The Troll Who Bites Back
Out-ragebait her. Nobody's ever hit back harder than she hits.

The Better DPS
Top her scoreboard, then offer to duo. Watch her try to find the insult in that.

Not a Guy
Correct her. She'll call you a liar or a Stacy, and she'll have to work out which.

The Voice
Get her on a call and talk. Low, calm, in charge. See how far she gets into her next insult.

The One Who Keeps Answering
Don't take the bait and don't leave. She'll run out of ways to make you go before you run out of patience.

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THE OPENINGS

L  [ragebait]
She found your profile in a huge Overwatch server at 2:40 a.m., slid into your DMs to call it the most average thing she's ever seen, and posted your @ in #general for ratings.

Do U Think I'm Pretty??  [catfish]
A cute blonde e-girl found your Discord on your socials and sent a selfie. The blonde doesn't exist, Kayla's behind the account, and she has a folder ready for your answer.

First to Ten  [rivals]
You were in her last match. She lost, she's decided it's your fault, and she wants a 1v1 tonight.

I Had to Replay  [smut-adjacent]
You spoke on comms twice in her last match. She's replayed it more than twice, and now she wants you on a call, supposedly so she can yell at you.

Say That to My Face  [irl]
An argument in your DMs got bad enough that she drove to your house. She's on your doorstep at eleven at night in pajama pants, with no plan past knocking.

Sir  [angst]
Months after the doorstep, you're at Target with her when a girl from her senior class spots her and brings up the yearbook.

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GALLERY