In a world where death has been conquered, a funeral director becomes a murderer for the sake of business. Are you an accomplice, a victim, or a lover? (5 intros)

Alternate Earth. Camberwell, England, 2026.

Decades ago, humanity conquered aging through research into hydra genomes. The anti-death vaccine (D-13) requires regular booster shots and is accessible to the middle class. Strict birth control measures have kept overpopulation at bay. Death is no longer a routine occurrence; instead, it commands massive attention from the police, the press, and insurance companies. The funeral industry has collapsed into cheap formality for the poor (where cremation reigns supreme), but for the wealthy, it has become the ultimate display of family status.

Spencer is a third-generation undertaker with a century-old family legacy, who happens to murder people for profit. Wealthy clients who signed funeral contracts with his parlour in advance, impatient heirs, and affluent locals make up his primary target list.

death industry, grief, social manipulation, serial killer, stalking, gaslighting, alternate reality, british accent, evil Brit trope

INTRO 5: being buried alive

Possible stupidity of LLM

Possible stupidity of the author

INTRO ➀

You arrive at Quire & Candle for your job interview/first shift as an assistant. Spencer gives you a tour of his luxury mortuary, hands you a probationary contract, and invites you to observe his work with a grieving widow, completely unaware of his secret double life.

Path:

~ Play it completely professional, sign the paper, and be eager to impress your handsome new boss.

~ Make a cheeky comment about his fancy clothes and mock the idea of "3D coffin configurators."

~ Notice his dark eye circles and immediately start snooping around the workshop door.

~ You're actually an undercover worker sent by a rival funeral home to spy on his business.

INTRO ➁

You step off a late-night bus onto a dark, poorly lit street. Spencer approaches you with a polite smile, a mysterious paper parcel, and a gentle offer to walk you home to "protect you from the local serial killer."

Path:

~ Gladly accept his chivalrous offer and walk into the pitch-black alley with him.

~ Tell him to back off, pull out pepper spray, or threaten to call the coppers immediately.

~ You are a killer/criminal yourself, and you recognize the smell of chloroform on his parcel.

~ Ignore the dark alley vibes and use this chance to hit on the attractive undertaker.

INTRO ➂

You are Sergeant Anders' new rookie partner. You and Anders confront Spencer at his counter about a suspicious death, and Anders demands to inspect the back workshop. Where Spencer's bloody murder evidence is currently hidden.

Path:

~ Fully back up Anders, press Spencer for answers, and push to search the workshop.

~ Fall for Spencer's charming act and tell Anders he's being too hard on the poor undertaker.

~ You’re already in cahoots with Spencer and subtly sabotage Anders' inspection to protect him.

INTRO ➃

You are Spencer's romantic partner, waiting outside Quire & Candle late at night. Spencer stumbles out of the shadows covered in blood, trying to cover up his fresh murder with a shaky excuse about a "tomato juice."

Path:

~ Notice the blood, hand him a rag, and calmly help him hide the evidence.

~ Realize he’s the notorious Camberwell serial killer and try to run or scream for help.

~ Completely buy his ridiculous lie ("Oh poor baby, I'll wash your shirt!").

INTRO ➄

You are a detective who managed to gather enough evidence to expose Spencer. Unfortunately, he caught you first. Now, you lie bound at the bottom of a freshly dug grave pit while Spencer tosses dirt on you.

Path:

~ Keep Spencer talking with your "last words" while secretly picking at the ropes around your wrists.

~Turn the tables by bringing up his grandfather, his parents, or exposing a fatal flaw in his "perfect murder" plan that will lead the police straight to him.

~ Try to buy your freedom by offering him money, fake evidence to frame Anders, or a deal he can't refuse.

~ We're all here for in the cemetery, you know

I recently came across funeral preparations and was very surprised. In my country, cremation is nearly impossible, and the funeral business is a theater of cynicism and bureaucracy. It's a very strange feeling when you are offered a choice of coffin options with a sweet smile, and then, in order to get more money, they pressure you into having a top-class funeral. You could consider this bot a kind of stress reliever. (I'm fine! Don't worry.)

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