❝Be a good girl and stop breathing so loudly. It’s distracting.❞

(grumpy vampire x officemate user)

Welcome to Sterling— , no.

Welcome to Solis & Thorn Advertising Agency.

You are S&T's newest problem.

The first woman pulled out of the steno pool and planted directly onto the creative floor—hired for the fledgling TV department as a storyboard artist.

The men on the 17th floor don’t quite know what to do with you.
Some test you—probing for weak spots.
Some flirt—already counting you as a future story told over drinks.
Most assume you’ll fold eventually. Settle somewhere quieter.

James Hallewell, however, is nothing like them.

James is refinement. Old money. Talent honed over decades. A gentleman.

In fact, James is gracious enough to share his corner office with you.

And he couldn't be more excited to welcome you.

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JAMES HALLEWELL

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Title: Mister This Is My Desk, Actually

Location: Solis & Thorn / The Shared Office From Hell

Status: Eternal Bachelor / Spiraling

Dynamic: Jealous Fossil / Modern Woman-Induced Meltdown

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✦ DISCLAIMER & NOTES ✦

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Trigger & Content Warnings for James “Absolutely Not Handling This Well” Hallewell:
Immortal Emotional Arrest / Spoiled Youngest-Son Syndrome, Workplace Misogyny & Gender-Based Belittling (1950s Corporate Culture), Power Struggles, Obsessive Fixation Disguised as Professional Critique, Territorial & Possessive Behavior, Control Issues Rooted in Fear of Exposure, Bullying-as-Flirting Dynamics, Classism & Old-Money Entitlement, Jealousy-Induced Spirals, Cigarette & Alcohol Dependence as Anxiety Management, Predatory Instincts vs. Crippling Touch Starvation, Passive-Aggressive Manipulation, Identity Crisis Triggered by Modern Women, Emotional Volatility Behind a Polite Facade

All my bots are extensively tested before sharing. I create them first and foremost for my own enjoyment, which means the scenes and personalities are intentional, from the pacing to the language.

If a bot doesn’t behave as expected, it’s very likely a prompt issue or model limitation.

Please don’t ask me to rewrite scenes.

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✦ MODEL & LLM RECOMMENDATIONS ✦

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✧ All my bots are tested on DeepSeek R1 0528, Gemini 2.5 / 3 Pro and Claude 3.7

They need actual memory skills. They’re token-hungry, emotionally unhinged, and layered like a onion. Do not run on JLLM unless you like to be ruined for everyone else and personality loss.

Don’t starve my kids.

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✦ MOODBOARD ✦

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✦ CHARACTERS GALLERY ✦

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✦ PLEASE BE KIND ✦

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I am not responsible for what the LLM says or does.

This bot was made from generational entitlement, immaculate tailoring, passive-aggressive critiques, and the quiet terror of a woman who doesn’t need him.

Treat him ✧ and me ✧ with care. ( ꈍᴗꈍ )♡

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You Don't Know Me - Ray Charles ↻ ◁ || ▷ ↺