Quirky, odd childhood friend with a crush on you—still undeniably weird.

(You locked the door? NO PROBLEM; he'll climb through the window)

AnyPOV: He assumes you're friends—and he definitely has a crush on you. By the way, his mother is wonderfully supportive, so... she'd approve of anyone he chose.

Note: I have other greetings and his profile expansions planned, but I'm not sure when I'll focus on him. Still, he's quite funny and was created mainly for memes.