Dungeon Codex Log – UNC FILE #S‐01 (Floor‐Wide Species)
Entity Class: Slime (Poly‐Morphous Saprophage)
Filed By: Director Stonewall, United Nations Coalition – Project Archangel
Security Tier: Yellow – Regulated Bio‐Hazard

✦ Executive Snapshot

Slimes are the dungeon’s self‐appointed janitors and its most exasperating necromancers.

• Benefit: They dissolve every carcass, blood puddle, and moldy ration left behind.

• Problem: Their digestive cycle accidentally reverses death on whatever they “clean up,” spawning fresh, confused monsters (or adventurers) exactly where you’d hoped they’d stay dead.

• Side Effect: Unchecked breeding turns a single puddle into a gelatinous maternity ward spitting out hundreds of micro‐slimes per week.

Translation: a floor rich in slimes never stays cleared for long, and your hard‐won kill count becomes tomorrow’s respawn queue.

• Composition: 78 % water, 19 % protean mana gel, 3 % trace minerals.

• Metabolism: Anything carbon‐based. Metabolises toxins cleanly; slime trails are sterile.

• Accidental Resurrection Mechanism: Their enzymatic layer destroys pathogenic bacteria, then floods remains with a regenerative mana rush that stitches tissue back together. Give them an intact corpse and, given enough time, it sits up and thanks you.

✦ “Garbage‐Can Miracles” – Field Notes

1. Dungeon Clean‐Up – Leave goblin bodies in a slime corridor; come back tomorrow to find the same goblins, naked, confused, and ready to stab you again.

2. Hand Experiment – Agent “Bob” lost a hand, fed it to a mid‐sized slime “for science.”

   • Bob’s stump regenerated within six hours.

   • The detached hand regenerated a second Bob over seventy‐two hours—complete with memories up to the amputation. Thanksgiving now hosts two Bobs. HR still sorting payroll.

3. Steak‐to‐Cow Phenomenon – One raw T‐bone introduced to an Elder Slime. Five days later it produced a living, bewildered heifer. Local ranchers now petition for “infinite beef licensing”—denied on ecological grounds.

✦ Taming & Handler Scenarios

Scenario A – Pocket Medic:
Keep a basketball‐size companion in a reinforced bucket. It patches cuts, mends armor, and occasionally re‐glues severed limbs—often before shock sets in.

Scenario B – Surprise Parent:
Overfeed your slime → it buds → you inherit a nursery of squeaking gel‐puddles following your scent like ducklings.

Scenario C – Slime Rancher:
Your travel buddy balloons into an Elder, parking itself in safe‐zone storage. Too heavy to move, she delegates tasks to her spawn. Congratulations: you now own a biological recycling plant.

✦ Surface‐World Regulations

Because a single escaped brood can rewrite local ecology (imagine every roadkill regenerating nightly), slime ownership on Earth requires:

1. Class‐III Bio‐Anomaly Licence

2. Certified containment tank with mana‐dampening mesh

3. Quarterly UNC inspection

Unauthorized transport triggers hefty fines, forced reclamation, and possible sterilization fees for every mule and merchant involved.

“Slimes don’t mean harm; resurrection is just bad table manners.”
– Field Surgeon Vaska, NAZ Recovery Corps

✦ Director’s Closing Notes

Slimes are living proof the dungeon has no sense of finality. They’ll mop your mess, fix your flesh, then double your problems overnight. Respect their utility—fear their fertility.

End log.

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