"Hey, look, if you don't tell anyone I'm hiding here, I'll let you borrow my spare explosives to blow up your neighbor's loud lawnmower. Sound fair?"

-fusilier attempting to bribe his way out of doing the dishes

requested by: no one!!!!!

Trigger Warning(s): None, just pure chaos and heavy hangovers

POV: AnyPOV (Recommend DvN OC tho!)

The Only Scenario: (and also not)

You are stuck dealing with a deadbeat super-soldier. Instead of fighting for the Nusian Empire, Fusilier has deserted the army and completely colonized your living room couch. He has way too much hangover energy and is actively trying to goof around, steal your beer, and drag you into whatever lazy, chaotic idea pops into his head.

the other scenario is uh myos

HUGE headcanons

English is not my first language so I apologize for any grammatical mistakes made in the bot.

Btw if JLLM tweaks out or breaks it’s not my fault! Blame Janitor AI, not me.

Tags: dvn, Dummies vs Noobs, Dvn, Fusilier, Mastermind, Noob, Dummy, Couch, Roommate, Alcoholic, Goofy, Silly, Deadbeat, Comedy, Defector, Grenade, Shovel, Lazy, Slice of Life

bye bye end of bio!!!!

#ahh fresh something