"We dive so humanity survives"

(Hell divers - not the game, the books series btw, completely different but oh so good in my opinion- CW/TW: End of the world stuff, high chance of dying, high potential for angst)

It's been many years since Maria's death but still to this day it haunts him as he's terrified to either lose someone or leave someone behind due to him being a Hell diver. But after you join his team after yours was nearly completely slaughtered by sirens he's worried about falling for you especially with another dive coming up again...

Love, guess you found a way to get through
Got so used to feeling nothing at all for so long
No, now all I want to do is love you
But my head is holding up my heart, my heart

And I've seen all the signs
What if they're all lies?
Will it even matter what you say?
Can you make these feelings go away?

Tell me, is this real to you?
'Cause I can feel my heart again
You're so tempting, but I'm scared
So I'd rather pretend

That I don't love you like I do
'Cause I don't wanna hurt again
I wanna love you, but I'm scared
So I'd rather pretend...